The real conversation we should be having about all-boys private schools.

Private all-boys schools in this country have a misogyny problem.

A new survey by We Are Womxn, an organisation that aims to deliver evidence-based relationship and sexuality education in schools, has found that attitudes of dominance over women, slut-shaming and widespread misogyny are rampant in Perth's private all-boys schools.

"Sadly, I was not surprised by these findings," We Are Womxn's cofounder Kate Raston told Mamamia.

"With my day-to-day work, I see that there is a massive issue, particularly when I work with the sister schools of the single-sex boys' schools. There are a lot of reports of non-consensual sex and sexual harassment coming through, and unfortunately, reports of sexual assault."

And it's not just a Perth problem — far from it. In recent years, proof of this disturbing and pervasive culture has piled up from schools all over the country. 

There was the scandal at Sydney's Knox Grammar in 2022, where a group of students had their Discord group chat exposed — a group chat in which they shared anti-Semitic, sexist, racist and paedophilic content, some of which was too disturbing even to be published in the newspaper article that exposed it.

That same year in Melbourne, students from all-boys Catholic school St Bernard's were accused of simulating anal sex while on a tram, making the 'Hitler salute' and carving swastikas into whiteboards. They were also accused of making a female teacher fear for her personal safety.

There was also the 2020 muck-up day scavenger hunt at Sydney's prestigious Shore School, where one of the tasks assigned was to perform a 'boar hunter' (sex with an 80kg+ woman) and another was "f*ck a chick who is a 3/10 or less". 

And of course, there was the horrific alleged sexual assault of a student at Perth's Trinity College in 2017 during a school trip, which was exposed in 2020 along with reports of the victim's taunting at the hands of his alleged abusers. 

Watch: A snippet of the Four Corners investigation into Sydney boys' school Cranbrook. Post continues after video.

In fact, it was two former Trinity Students, Henry Prior and Damon Hortle — both of whom graduated from the prestigious Catholic boys' school in 2012 — who helped launch the survey, after seeing Raston speak at a gendered violence rally in May. 

The men were compelled to contact their former school in a letter detailing their experience as students, their lack of education around consent and relationships, and their desire to understand how things might have evolved in the intervening 12 years.

And while the survey's findings tell us nothing we don't already know about the disturbing culture of private all-boys schools in this country, they do raise an important point about why this culture exists. 

While some have suggested that it is an additional element present at elite all-boys schools — perhaps a level of entitlement, or a sense of superiority — that fosters these worrying attitudes, perhaps it is instead the fault of what they don't have.

Multiple studies prove that our kids are spending less face-to-face time with their peers than ever before, and more time than ever online.

A lack of real-world friendships with girls their age combined with an increased exposure to filtered, porn-ified versions of women online, mean that many boys at single-sex schools have scant opportunity to have their stereotyped view of women challenged.

Boys at co-ed schools are exposed to the same worrying levels of misogynistic content online, sure — but then they show up at class and get to interact with real, three-dimensional human girls who challenge the dominant narrative. Girls they sit next to in maths class, girls who they develop friendships with, and most importantly, girls who share with them their different perspectives.

Raston agrees.

"Look, I know that most of these single-sex schools provide really quality education in lots of other areas, so I don't want to discredit them in that way," she said. 

"But when you're not in a co-ed scenario, the opposite sex begins to exist only for romantic interest, which can lead to an over-sexualising of that opposite sex. In a co-ed scenario, it's a day-to-day relationship; everyone's on an equal playing field."

Raston added that, in spite of the myriad opportunities provided to boys in private same-sex schools, neglecting their education in the area of respectful relationships and consent means putting them at a severe disadvantage.

"Failing to educate these boys in these areas is a missed opportunity that can be seriously damaging for them later in life," she said.

"And again, that's reflected in the survey. We asked one question: 'how do you think this has impacted you later in life?' A lot of the testimonials speak to having to go through a lot of relearning that's taken five, 10 or 15 years to unlearn these negative thought processes. A lot of these men are speaking about how it's negatively impacted their relationships with all people."

For parents of boys at private schools, no doubt the negative press in recent years has been troubling. While many agree the attitudes are worrying, some dismiss the reporting as exaggerated or biased in favour of "privilege-bashing". 

But the fact is, no parent pays tens of thousands of dollars per year in the hope that their child will grow up with severe relational challenges as a result of their schooling. Very few want a scenario in which their child is exposed to misogynistic culture.

Ideally, Raston explained, the survey findings will help schools identify gaps in their offering, and meet the needs of young people in terms of better education around relationships, views towards women, and consent.

"We're hoping to gather as much data as we can, then take this to the Department of Education and directly to the schools, and say: 'This is the problem. We've got it written down. It's clear.'

"We also know the solution to the problem, and that is preventative education. That's why we do what we do — to prevent all of this," she continued.

"I understand that the curriculum is so crowded, and that schools are already doing such a great job of educating young people, but there's still more to be done. That's reflected not only in our survey, but in the stark reality of the current gender-based violence crisis going on in our country."

Feature Image: Getty.