opinion

Commentary on Meghan Markle's 'wedding body' proves that women just can't win.

Losing the couple of kilos you’ve been wanting to lose for years is a perfectly normal, and common, thing for many brides-to-be to do.

It’s quite literally human nature to want to feel your best when you’re going to be on show in front of everyone you love, and have photos taken that you will hopefully one day show your grandkids.

So the faux concern about Meghan Markle‘s pre-wedding weight-loss – if in fact that’s even happened – is ridiculous, and unwarranted.

In 2018, aren’t we supposed to be a tad more evolved than this? Haven’t we learned by now that commentary on a woman’s body is off-limits?

For example, weren’t we disgusted earlier this month when Michelle Pfeiffer was asked what her weight was when she played a drug addict in Scarface?

 

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The #MeToo movement is largely about stopping the objectification of women’s bodies, and empowering women to have control over themselves. And yet…here are the headlines about the royal bride-to-be:

“Meghan in bridal bootcamp!”

“Markle needs dress repeatedly altered!”

“Star’s dramatic wedding weight loss!”

Ugh. Please. Stop. Talking.

There is no need to share any before and after photos, because whether Markle has lost weight, or not, is irrelevant. Because what a woman chooses to do with her body is simply no-one else’s business.

Yes, many of us are invested in the upcoming royal wedding. In an often challenging and cruel world, the occasion shines as a beacon of hope and also, it’s just simply a fun distraction.

We care about the wedding cake. We care about what the very stylish Markle will wear. Who will be a bridesmaid? Will she hand out sugared almonds? Where will the undoubtedly glamorous honeymoon be? All the details of this fantasy wedding – we absolutely want to know it all, because romance.

But those horrible headlines scream the implication Markle is insecure, superficial and silly – which is not fair.

And, contrary to the headlines, most of the women who care about the royal wedding, do not care about Meghan’s body. It’s not newsworthy. And it’s beneath us.

Meghan Markle had to go to Royal kidnap training, and this is the greatest thing ever.

The tabloid interest in Markle’s weight leading to her big day is part of a larger wedding issue: the pressure on women to be something they’re not, rather than simply what they feel is a better/healthier version of themselves, on ‘the happiest day of their lives’.

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Let’s reverse the discussion for a moment. Let’s consider the potential headline:

Meghan Markle REFUSES to lose weight before her wedding.

Could you imagine the outcry in the tabloids if she dared to turn up looking the same as she always has? Same sort of make up? No new hairstyle that brides to be for will copy for the next decade?

What if she wore a dress she’s worn before….oh, the horror!

There’s already pressure on brides to show the best version of themselves, and a lot of that comes from brides themselves wanting to do that. To a large extent, that’s human nature, and that’s ok. Many of us have done it. But it’s not mandatory.

Neither is succumbing to the expectation transform into something you’re entirely not.

There are plenty of women who don’t choose to do that. Who just want to be who they were at the moment their partner decided to put a ring on it.

But, if we are guided by the tabloids, that choice would be problematic, and it would attract headlines such as: Bride who has tickets on herself doesn’t change a thing.

It’s such a ridiculous double standard, perhaps we should consider simply celebrating what the bride wants us to celebrate – her joy – and stop feigning concern about how she chooses to present herself?

Until then, let’s face it: every bride is damned if she does, and damned if she doesn’t. And that applies infinitely more to Meghan Markle.