After visiting Ballerina Farm, Megan knows what we don't understand about Hannah Neeleman.

The world of tradwives is one that can scarcely be accessed from the outside, which is arguably what makes the phenomenon so fascinating.

Famous 'tradewife' influencers like Hannah Neeleman and Nara Smith seem somehow untouchable and what happens behind-the-scenes of their picturesque existence largely remains a mystery to the rest of us. 

But recently The Times journalist Megan Agnew was allowed to go behind the curtain, spending a day with Hannah Neeleman - a tradwife content creator who resides on Ballerina Farm in Utah - along with her husband and eight children. 

The article she wrote about her experience there quickly went viral. And what Agnew saw was far from the quaint, simple life we see on social media.

In reality, Ballerina Farm is a business and a brand. And the brains behind the operation is not Daniel Neeleman, as many outsiders have suggested, but Hannah herself.

"Hannah was the face, you know, and she's also the brains, but she was the face of it. She's head of marketing," Agnew told Mia Freedman on Mamamia's No Filter podcast. 

"She understands social media in a way that Daniel doesn't. She understands it really thoroughly, and she understands what other people are doing and what works, and she's very engaged with it all. And she's the one who uploads all the content."

Listen to the interview. Post continues after audio.

Agnew could not deny Neeleman's incredible work ethic and emphasised that, contrary to what others may think, the partnership between Neeleman and her husband seemed very much equal, in both parenting and business.

"Yes, in terms of the kids and looking after the kids, he was way more involved than many other modern dads. I would have thought. You know, the kids joined him on the farm," Agnew said.

"So I think that they are equals and that they both have different stakes in the same company, But I think that from my interactions with him and her, he seemed to have the final say in it." 

The tradwife phenomenon has become increasingly popular since the pandemic, many associating it with a desire to return to more traditional gender roles and simpler lives.

Agnew chalks it down to a fantasy born out of the male gaze, closely tied to the strong family values more prominent in places like America. 

"Well, it's kind of a man's dream, right, it's like she can have all of my children that I impregnate her with, and she's a beauty queen and she turns out well, and she looks like this while she's on my arm, and that's the perfect presentation of like American family values, which I think you're right," she said. 

"I think that so much of this sort of femininity is about performing ease and about making things look easy and pleasant and nice."

Additionally, a lot of Neeleman's messaging is about sacrifice.

Neeleman was a former ballerina, who gave up her promising dancing career in New York in order to prioritise her family and their business. And this backstory, is another part of the huge fascination with her and her content.

Hannah Neeleman with her husband and kids. Image: Instagram/ballerinafarm

In a moment alone with Agnew, Neeleman admitted that this; running the farm, making content about cooking and family, was not always her dream. Her first dream was to be in New York. 

"She was like, 'I wanted New York. That was my dream.' But as we said earlier, she wants it now. Dreams changed her life now," Agnew said.

"'And we are creating something bigger, and we are creating a legacy, a family legacy. And how important is that? And there's nothing else more important.' So you could see the shift from her really struggling with it and losing that identity of her own as a ballerina, to then reframing it essentially,."

When asked about Neeleman's happiness, Agnew had a rather bittersweet answer to share. 

"I think that she has grown up in a community and a world which doesn't allow her to be connected to the question, 'Am I happy?'"

Feature image: Instagram.