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Timothy ruined Tori's 'morning hot girl walk', which for those unaware used to simply be called a 'morning walk'.
This is because he asked her if she really thought Jack was into her, and said they were his target at this week's dinner party.
That is highly audacious and slightly unhinged to just say to someone in the street, and Tori says she used to get paid to argue with cashed up businessmen so she's down for a fight.
1. What is that job and how do I get it?
2. LET'S F***ING GO.
As everyone prepares for the dinner party, Lucinda jokes about sh*tting out some "golden eggs". Are they... kegel balls? It's unclear but it would be on brand if they were.
Sara and Tim are getting ready separately because he is mad she cancelled three dates in a row and she thinks this makes him too needy(???)
After production sets set up the night's third piece of drama (the women want to tell Ben he's a dirtbag for mocking Ellie — yay!) we meet Tori and Jack again, discussing how they're the strongest couple here.
UM EXCUSE ME?
It's the end of Intimacy Week, so John Aiken and Mel have finished their Piña coladas, hung up their pool towels and returned to work.
They are also excited about the drama that Alessandra's genital cupping has manifested.
Sara and Tim arrive to the sound of horror movie music.
Tim reckons they "don't have the best vibe". I agree.
They are fighting as Lauren and Jonathan enter the room and the four of them commiserate over Intimacy Week destroying their intimacy.
The others all arrive yada yada WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT JONATHAN, TIM AND RICHARD TALKING TO TRISTAN.
Jono wonders if Tristan would stop his negative self-talk if he knew that every time he does it, it makes everyone around him feel bad too.
"If it stops you from doing it, it will stop this repetitive cycle in your mind of negativity towards yourself when it shouldn't be there," he says.
It's so sweet and has led me to do something completely unprecedented. A first in MAFS recap history.
Place a man's head on a green flag.
Unfortunately, the green flag is very quickly pulled down in favour of the show's greatest red one, as Tori and Jack walk into the room.
Tori recounts her encounter with Timothy as he and Lucinda Light, musical kegel balls in hand, arrive. Everyone talks about how wonderful Lucinda Light is and yes. We should dedicate an entire episode to this at some point.
The last to arrive are Ben and Ellie, who perfectly follow Lauren's predicted script. Get her a producer job, stat!
Only after Lauren physically extracts Ellie from Ben's vicinity do we learn that they had a second fight. Because as they were going to sleep, Ben said he didn't think they were a match????
How dare he disrespect the experts' guesses hard work like that.
Basically: he later apologised, Ellie accepted it, she wants the women to leave him alone tonight, and the women will not be leaving him alone tonight.
As soon as they sit down for dinner, Lauren and Sara are like "hey Ben why are you such a dirtbag?"
He says he was going to walk out of the experiment earlier in the week.
He absolutely was not going to walk out of the experiment earlier in the week.
HIS PODCAST NEEDS DOWNLOADS.
He then says his made-up almost-decision had nothing to do with Ellie, despite Ellie quite literally telling the women that he said it was to do with her, and suddenly everyone is circling like sharks.
The kids topic comes up again and Ben's answer is much more wishy-washy than his "epiphany" the other night, leading Jonathan to attack.
SUSPICOUS, WEIRD, ETC.
He skates through it, not because of skill, but because we simply need to move on to Timothy being a full-time hater.
He says it is his duty to have an opinion on everything and I just do not think that is... true.
Tori says, with a lot of alleged respect towards Lucinda Light, that there is no connection in his relationship and she and Jack are leaps and bounds ahead of other couples.
Neither backs down until Lauren brings up that one of Timothy's exes was 23????????????
WHERE DID SHE GET THAT TEA.
He says he has dated women aged from 53 to 23 and doesn't have a type and omg dude stop talking.
Sigh. I suppose I must officially turn in my Timothy apologist card.
Lucinda Light feels humiliated and HOW BLOODY DARE HE.
Lucinda Light tells the group that she is also assessing whether Timothy — who watches TV and eats sugar lol — is for her, but mostly she just wants to crawl under a blanket and hide.
We ride at dawn.
Andrea asks the table if anyone likes a tongue in their ear hole. Richard does. Jayden's down to find out.
Then we get another minute of Cass talking about how much of a sweet angel Tristan is.
Bless them ok cool love it etc. etc. let's get to the promised shouting.
Tim is asked how he's been going and Sara's response is even intimidating to me through a screen!!!
He tells everyone about their three cancelled dates, with Cass finds ABSURD.
Cass calls her out on it and the experts are STOKED because 1. she made great points and 2. if she continues like that they might be able to fit in another week's holiday.
Sara defends herself and Tim tries to reply, but Sara speaks over him so much that Jonathan and JACK have to tell her to let him speak.
Sara says Tim didn't even plan a proper date, but he... did. He told her to block out her day from 2pm and to wear something nice. She disputes that and then he yells at her.
SHE yells at HIM not to yell at HER, then runs away while yelling even louder.
IT MAKES ME WANT TO YELL TOO.
Tim immediately feels bad for yelling, but says he reached a breaking point after feeling unheard for weeks now.
The men empathise with him, while Sara tells Tori, Sara and Ellie she wanted to have the weekend to herself but also for girl time which like, mood, but you could probably do that without getting fake married on television????
And Eden and Tori know she's being a lil silly.
Tim pulls Sara aside to apologise for raising his voice and to attempt to work through their issues in a less yelly communication style.
Sara is not here for it.
She reckons he actually did have plenty of time to speak up, in between the split seconds in which she was not speaking, obviously???
Oh, and it's up to him to fix this.
I THNK THAT'S WHAT HE'S TRYING TO DO RIGHT NOW.
I AM SO CONFUSED.
She leaves the dinner party in tears.
The poor experts aren't getting that extra week of time off, are they?
Catch up on our MAFS recaps here:
- Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: HE DID NOT JUST SAY THAT.
- Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: Lucinda is the MAFS hero we need.
- Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: One groom discovers that marrying a stranger is... a lot.
- Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: We will not be listening to this man's podcast.
- Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: The season's most chaotic bride.
- Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: 'He's completely full of sh*t.'
- Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: Jayden did WHAT with WHOM in front of WHOMST?
- Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: You can't just compare your new wife to your dog.
- Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: The award for worst performance in a reality TV show goes to...
- Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: THE GENITAL CUPPING IS HELPING NO ONE.
- Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: Fake epiphanies, golden showers and cancelled dates.
Chelsea McLaughlin is Mamamia's Senior Entertainment Writer. For more pop culture takes, recommendations and sarcasm, you can follow her on Instagram.
Feature image: Nine.
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