Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: A bride brings ghosts to her wedding.

To catch up on all the Married at First Sight recaps and gossip, check out the MAFS hub page. We've got you covered.

Sara has written Tim an apology letter, saying being in a relationship with someone who tries is a foreign concept to her but she will not cancel their dates anymore.

Lovely.

Unfortunately, all is not so well at Cass and Tristan's.

Tristan voluntarily slept on the couch which upset Cass as she wants hugs and kisses and idk man maybe just like... a touch of the hand at this point. Quite literally anything would be nice.

It's time for more fake weddings! 

I simply will not be calling Michael an intruder.

The poor man has been waiting patiently in the same spot since John Aiken came to visit him four weeks ago, and he has finally been allowed to move.

Imagine the pins and needles oh god

We learn more about him and he is — pending any classic MAFS chaos in the next few weeks — a delight.

The experts say they worked really, really hard for at least two hours to find Michael a new match.

His name is Stephen and HOLY FABIO. He's a twin with a huge family and a scar from being in a car accident when he was eight.

And he's really hot.

Their vows are adorable and not to be dramatic but I need these two to be within the experiment's six point nine per cent success rate (that's the real number! I did division! And hahahahahahahahaha wow).

The other couples, who probably won't bump up that percentage come the end of the season, receive a letter.

"But this is no ordinary letter," the narrator says. I am so embarrassingly millennial because my brain automatically imagines a Hogwarts x MAFS crossover.

The couples will not be attending the world's foremost school of witchcraft and wizardry, sadly. They just have to settle for the dark magic that is watching one stranger fake-marry another stranger for our entertainment.

CRUCIO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HOLD UP A SECOND IS TIMOTHY WEARING A DOBBY MASK.

TIMMY IS A FREE ELF

I have way more questions than we have time for right now.

It's time to meet Madeleine. She is a psychic medium whose abilities have... told her to turn to John Aiken et al. for help?

Hoy boy!

I think it's very funny that network rivalry means they cannot also tell us that she was on Home & Away for 55(!) episodes. You know who would've loved that piece of information? Collins. Oh, what could've been!

Her psychicness means she can... "audibly hear things". As opposed to the rest of us, who hear things... also audibly. That's actually the definition of audible, believe it or not! To hear things! I even Googled it because I momentarily felt gaslit by the psychic community.

She yells at spirits (?) and speaks about knowing things about people in a way that feels very threatening.

"Except the MAFS success rate lol what is it?"

Madeleine wants someone who is kind and able to handle the psychic of it all.

She has been matched with Ash, who on first impression is an ANGEL.

He loves his family, is a father figure to his younger brothers, and cries as he remembers his older brother who died two years ago.

Mel talks about how great Ash is for what feels like an eternity and IF YOU LOVE HIM SO MUCH WHY DON'T YOU FAKE MARRY HIM FOR OUR ENTERTAINMENT INSTEAD.

Madeleine begins their wedding day with a "download" about how her soon-to-be fake husband must be 37.

Not 37

Ash arrives and is immediately heckled by a strange blonde lady with a fringe blazer. He's confused, but that is only because the poor guy has not yet met the icon that is Lucinda Light.

Madeleine arrives, and I am devastated that neither Alf nor Irene made the trip.

"I am Madeleine, I'm 30. I'm really deep and weird," she begins.

This might be too niche a reference, but it's giving Jughead.

While Ash is immediately stoked, because she's hot, Madeleine is slightly worried because she's seen Ash's energy.

She says she is a medium and Lauren asks if she means the clothing size.

Love her so much 

Ash's vows are nice. Madeleine's are "raw-dogged", which is not even the craziest part.

SHE STARTS CRYING.

THEN ONE MOMENT LATER, SHE CRACKS UP LAUGHING.

AND THEN SHE SCREAMS.

IN THE AIR.

FOR HERSELF TO SHUT UP.

Yeah exactly

Tori and Lauren are confused and concerned, while Lucinda Light thinks she has found her new best friend.

Ash digs her, quirks and all. However, Madeleine receives another "download" from the spirits or ghosts or whatever they call themselves, and gets the ick.

It turns out ghosts are f***ing narks

While Michael and Stephen are jumping on each other — NOT LIKE THAT — Madeleine and Ash's photoshoot is a little more awkward.

Because Madeleine refuses to smile for their photos.

UMMMM I THOUGHT SHE WAS AN ACTOR??? Alf Stewart would not stand for this.

But then Ash brings up how he might have seen a ghost last night and she's STOKED. Because ghosts are her friends!

A happy family already <3

No ghosts have sh*t-stirred at Michael and Stephen's reception, which is going along swimmingly, until a real-life human woman mentions Michael's "baby mamas".

She misses some prettyyyy key context out, that Michael was a sperm donor for his friends' children. 

Instead, she frantically backpedals by stealing Shrek's onion analogy. 

Stephen asks Michael to explain, which he does, and Stephen thinks his kindness to help his friends is a huge green flag.

I'll probably live to regret this 

At Madeleine and Ash's reception, Tristan and Cass are crumbling.

They make awkward small talk and Cass wonders if Tristan is "repulsed" by her. Considering she's basically sunshine, I do not think that is the case.

But before they fight, Lucinda Light and Timothy proudly share that they've nicknamed their new best friend's "Mash". Also, they're wearing matching outfits. Against ALL my better judgement, I cannot help but root for them. 

ANYWAY.

Cass asks Tristan if they're okay.

Narrator: They were not, in fact, all good.

She says she is bored and Tristan is offended because he's planned every date and feels like he's making a major effort. But she's not bored with him, she's just bored with wanting him to touch her.

They end up arguing about completely different things.

Sigh.

Tristan wanders out of the reception early, missing Madeleine yelling about the lack of music and also Lauren and Tori laughing about Madeleine yelling about the lack of music.

I SAID MAAAAYYYYYBEEEEEEE

Lucinda Light thinks Madeleine is a magnificent piece of art and I desperately, desperately need to know how she would use the full breadth of the English language to describe me.

Back at Michael and Stephen's wedding, Stephen asks Michael if there's anything he wants to "pre-warn" him about. I'm sure zero producers were involved in the making of that question.

Michael says he was previously matched with someone — so long, Simon, we hardly knew ye — who dropped out, so Stephen is essentially John Aiken's second choice.

And Stephen, understandably, doesn't enjoy feeling like John Aiken's fill-in.

See you tomorrow.

Catch up on our MAFS recaps here:

• Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: HE DID NOT JUST SAY THAT.
• Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: Lucinda is the MAFS hero we need.
• Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: One groom discovers that marrying a stranger is... a lot.
• Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: We will not be listening to this man's podcast.
  
• Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: The season's most chaotic bride.
  
• Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: 'He's completely full of sh*t.'
• Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: Jayden did WHAT with WHOM in front of WHOMST?
• Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: You can't just compare your new wife to your dog.
• Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: The award for worst performance in a reality TV show goes to...
• Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: THE GENITAL CUPPING IS HELPING NO ONE.
• Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: Fake epiphanies, golden showers and cancelled dates.
• Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: There is simply too much yelling about yelling.
• Mamamia recaps Married At First Sight: No two people have ever wanted to hug less.

Chelsea McLaughlin is Mamamia's Senior Entertainment Writer. For more pop culture takes, recommendations and sarcasm, you can follow her on Instagram.

Feature image: Nine.