To catch up on all the MAFS 2020 recaps and gossip, check out The Twins recaps and visit our MAFS hub page. And sign up for our Recaps newsletter to get them straight into your inbox.
Married At First Sight has been back on our screens for literally one day and we’re already wondering what the heck we did without it.
As expected, the new season got off to a dramatic start and our first two weddings between strangers, with Poppy and Luke and Cathy and Josh getting fake-married for love, but mostly teeth-whitening endorsements.
Poppy’s husband had a terrible accident. Post continues below video.
But before that, we watched as our prospective husbands and wives met in some godforsaken Sydney Airbnbs for their bucks and hens parties.
We liked this mainly because it helped us figure out who’s going to be responsible for the drama in the later episodes.
After sitting through nearly two hours of trash only MAFS can provide, here are the most bizarre moments from episode one of MAFS Australia 2020:
1. When they said they’d received 15,000 applications.
You’re telling us 15,000 people are willing to put themselves through an experiment with precisely no scientific backing?
I guess Instagram followers are worth it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
2. Connie “trusts the science”.
Did we mention there's no science in this 'experiment'?
John, Mel and Trish basically just play 'Guess Who' with the participants headshots.
"Does your person fulfil precisely none of the woman's wants and needs?"
But Connie, a marine biologist, trusts it. A tad concerning.
3. Poppy's husband's 'accident'.
"I've got two-year-old twins," she explains. "When they were six weeks old my husband, he had a terrible accident."
Oh no! What could it be?
"He tripped and fell and landed in his co-workers vagina and he's still stuck there."
Oh my god.
4. The awkward toast.
"Let's do a toast that no one's going to bang each others husbands," the women yell at their hens do and... someone is definitely going to bang someone else's husband, and it's going to be such GOOD DRAMA.
5. Cock and Block.
Thoughts and prayers for Poppy's twin sons, Cock and Block. With those names, the school playground is going to be brutal.
6. 'Poppy really needs someone who can be there for her and her two kids, let's match her with this FIFO worker'.
It's almost like they're matching complete opposites in the hope of it being a train wreck, therefore increasing drama and ratings. Almost.
7. Poppy freezing up.
Poppy definitely did not want to be at her wedding because she'd left her children - Cock and Block - to be there and she just realised marrying a stranger is a bit of a risk, ya know?
8. The smelling of dirty t-shirts.
According to expert Trish, Cathy and Josh are destined to work out because they smelled each others dirty t-shirts and didn't mind the smells.
Firstly, that's a bit gross, and secondly please see above points about there being NO SCIENCE TO THIS SHOW SO CAN THEY PLEASE STOP PRETENDING.
9. The bride who has psychic dreams.
Mmhm.
Two weddings down, many more to go.
There's no doubt we can expect many more weird, ridiculous and dramatic moments as the season continues tonight.
Top Comments
I only watched it because I went to school with one of the contestants - and by watch, I mean put the kids to bed and duck my head out here and there.
I missed the 'cock and block' thing - did the husband make a joke about it?
No, it was Poppy. She joked that she calls her twins Cock and Block, because they stop her from meeting men.
Isn't the whole show ridiculous?