Unlike Olaf, I don’t like warm hugs. Actually, I don’t like hugs at all. Unfortunately for me, I live in one of those hug-loving communities. It’s where the A-frame just doesn’t cut it; the side hug is an abomination. I can’t make a quick wave goodbye escape because you come running after me with a singsong “don’t think you’ll get away that easily!”
I cringe as you step towards me with that goofy smile and press your body against mine. Boob on boob. It’s weird. Can’t you see? I know I come across as cold, distant even. I love you. Just don’t touch me.
Gary Chapman wrote a few books about love and how people give and receive it. He says that there are five ways that people do it: gift giving, spending quality time, by acts of service, words of affirmation and my dreaded physical touch.
The point he makes is that you can try to love the crap out of someone without them ever feeling loved because the way you loved them was not their love language. I can promise you, I do not feel loved by your hug pursuit. I die inside when you try to hold my hand. Even a high five makes me sweat.
I recognise, though, that you do feel loved when we hug. When we hold hands. When we make up a stupid handshake. It’s why I put on a grimace and go with it. I love you. So I’ll hug you.
Yes or no – are you a hugger?
Michaela Daphne is a blogger, copywriter and “one day to-be-published” fiction author. She is a regular contributor to Catholic Online, the largest Catholic news website in the world and Australian newspaper, The Catholic Leader. Outside freelance writing, she oversees the marketing of two Brisbane small businesses.
Top Comments
i mind hugs from people i don't know. for me it's kinda not polite that someone you knew for like 2 hours want to hug you. sorry but you should respect that some people need to know you for a bit longer to actually allow you hugs. for example: my mom's friend have a habit that she kiss us on our cheeks when we visit her or when she came visit us. i don't mind it, because i know her for a while, but it's still weird for me. i used to be more open about hugging others. but now, i notice that i don't allow hugs to everyone. i actually noticed a year ago. i only like hugs from my parents, people i've been known for a while (not always) and my realtives, but it did happen that i almost didn't allowed the hug. i know i'm picky and sensitive, but really, some people really need to learn that you just can't and shouldn't hug everyone. you have to keep the distance.
I'm not a hugger. I'm not a kisser on the cheeker either. In fact unless you are my partner, child or specific family member, don't touch me. Also, don't ever think it would be a nice gift idea to book me in for a massage. Quite simply, don't touch me. I don't wanna touch you.