In 2018, Steph was in a car accident. Now, she eats and drinks through her heart.

The first thing Steph remembers is losing all feeling in her left arm.

The then 22-year-old, who was studying to become a registered nurse, had just finished a 12-hour shift at hospital when she and her boyfriend decided to get a bite to eat at a local Max Brenner restaurant in Sydney. 

Around 9pm the young couple turned at a roundabout on the way to the restaurant when a woman in another car approached.

Steph was in the front passenger seat. 

"She t-boned our car and my side got all the impact," the now 27-year-old told Mamamia.

With numbness in her arm and pain in her neck, Steph was in a state of complete "shock".

Still, she initially didn’t think her injuries were that serious. 

Having grown up with a connective tissue disorder, as well as other heart conditions, she thought the loss of feeling in her arm was likely related to a surgery she had on her shoulder the year before. 

"My arm had been popping in and out all the time… so I just thought I aggravated where I had the surgery," she explained. "But it was not that."

Instead, the accident left her with a brachial plexus injury, two slipped discs in her neck and a twisted rib cage. 

Her boyfriend, Adam, meanwhile, was left with a broken ankle. 

At 22, Steph, who would spend her weekends travelling with Adam up and down NSW's coast, or racing cars on a raceway, found herself going through months of rehabilitation. 

Six months in, Steph was left devastated when doctors told her she wouldn’t be able to return to her dream job of nursing because of her injuries.  

"I was really distraught because I was wheelchair bound as a teen from my POTS [postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome] and I really fought to get better and rehabilitate to become a nurse... And then to get it all taken away from going to Max Brenner… that was pretty bad."

Months later, things took a turn for the worst when Steph started experiencing bowel problems and found herself throwing up after eating. 

"As I was recovering from all the other injuries to my neck, I was taken down by stomach problems. So I went to the doctor and they said you've got gastroparesis."

Doctors said she developed the condition because the car accident damaged her vagus nerve, as well as the combination of her pre-existing health conditions and the medicines she was given to recover, which didn't help with her stomach. 

As a result, her stomach was left "paralysed" as if it had "gone to sleep".

Looking back, Steph said she entered a "very, very deep, depressive state".

"It just felt like everything was snowballing. And things were just getting worse and worse."

With her stomach no longer able to absorb nutrients like it used to, Steph ended up having an NG tube put in, which went through her nose, bypassed her stomach and into her intestine. At home, she would have to give herself "feeds" - a type of formula full of nutritions - through the tube when she slept. 

She was also given another tube that went into her stomach to drain the contents.

However, in 2020, Steph's health took another turn when she realised she wasn't putting on any weight. 

Doctors found that she was not absorbing anything through her intestines either, and diagnosed her with intestinal failure. 

As a result, she was put on TPN, total parenteral nutrition, a form of nutrition that goes into her bloodstream and bypasses her digestive system. 

Steph would have to go into the hospital for a few weeks at a time to receive TPN, which travels from a bag on an IV pole into a line attached to her body. 

Unfortunately, TPN, which Steph says is essentially "oil straight into your bloodstream", comes with risks such as liver failure and sepsis - something Steph experienced in 2020 when she came close to death and had her gallbladder removed. 

In 2021, as the pandemic worsened and Steph's health failed to improve, Steph agreed to have her TPN at home, which involves hooking up the fluid to a Hickman line, which is inserted underneath her skin on her chest and tunnels the fluid into a large vein directly into her heart.

Essentially, it would mean she would now eat and drink through her heart. 

But Steph was initially reluctant. 

"With the Hickman, you can't remove it... and I didn't want this noodle looking thing hanging out of me," she explained. 

Still she knew she "didn't really have an option", and went ahead with the surgery.

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Two years on, she now feels she has her life back - even if it does look a little different to what it once was. 

Now, Steph has to hook herself up to her TPN bag for up to 16 hours a day, six nights a week, to get the nutrients she needs. 

"I'll attach it at 6pm at night and take it down around 10am. I need to be attached to either my IV pole at home or if I decide to go out, I need to have it in my backpack." 

Thanks to TPN, Steph doesn't have to eat regular food, nor does she get hungry. But she can still have food when she's craving a certain taste. 

"I'm currently on my period so I get cravings for chocolate and lollies and things like that," she shared. 

She's also thankful she can still eat on social occasions when she goes out with friends or dates with Adam. 

She just has to manually empty the contents of her stomach through a G tube afterwards. 

Steph, who shares her health journey on TikTok, says it took her around two months to get used to living with her Hickman line. 

One question her 26,000 followers often ask her is if she still needs to go to the bathroom. 

To which the answer is yes, just not as often because she doesn't eat as much as the average person. 

Steph can also swim and shower - it just takes a lot longer than it did before the accident, because she has to be careful not to get the dressing over her line wet. 

"When I don't want to get my dressing wet, I have to cover the line with a gauze and I put a big dressing that's twice the size of the line on top of that.

"When I change my dressing I make that the day when I wash my hair and shave my legs and do everything so I can get my dressing wet. Then I get out of the shower and straightaway clean the Hickman line with alcohol and chlorhexidine... So it's a lot of effort, it's not an easy life."

Unfortunately, the line has also impacted Steph in other ways.

During the early days, she found it became a barrier in her relationship as she struggled to love the way her body looked with all "the tubes hanging out of me". 

"I really struggled with feeling attractive... I felt like my independence had been lost. And I had so much negative self talk," she shared. 

"I just thought, well, I don't love me. So why would [Adam] love me? But my partner is absolutely beautiful, he has accepted every hurdle and every surgery with such grace and he picks me up when I'm down." 

Eventually, she overcame the mental hurdle and learnt to feel comfortable in her own skin. 

The couple, who got engaged in 2021, also had to adapt their approach to intimacy.

As Steph explained, they have to be mindful of her IV pole which she is hooked up to at night and stands at the side of her bed. However, during the day she is not connected to anything. 

"We choose when and where, and what's appropriate with what kind of situation I'm in and what time of the day it is."

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Steph also gets asked on TikTok if she can have children. 

"From the outside, you're probably like, 'oh wow, she definitely can't have kids'. But there's actually no reason why I couldn't have a baby when I do fall pregnant, which I'm hoping to, towards the end of the year, or next year," she explained. 

"The feeding tube will stay there. But they will just have to change the tube size and make it able to grow with my stomach growing."

As well as having children in the future, Steph is also excited to tie the knot with Adam in June and move into their house that is currently being built. 

The 27-year-old is also hoping to return to work part time in a special care nursery, in a few months once she has received her registration clearing her fit enough to work. 

Steph, who walked on a catwalk for Fashion Week last year, also says she will continue to share her journey on TikTok, educating people about invisible illnesses.

"If you saw me walking down the street, you would never assume that I couldn't eat and that I couldn't absorb through my stomach... So I want to educate people about invisible illnesses, and that you have no idea what another person is going through. I get looks when I park in disabled spots, because why would the young girl, who looks fit and healthy have a disabled sticker? So I want to educate about that."

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She also wants to teach people that life doesn't end after an injury or illness. 

"I want to educate people that we live completely full and wholesome lives... There's so many opportunities that your illness can give you. It can give you a passion for nursing, or it can give you a passion for helping others with your illness. And yes, some days, I'm all about my illness, because I'm debilitated by it, but at the same time, you still have a life outside of that."

It's a message she particularly wants people going through a similar experience to know. 

"A daunting as it is having these medical devices and losing your independence,...  you do have control."

"There's a light at the end of the tunnel, even though you can't see it."

Feature Image: Supplied.