Weddings are a glorious opportunity to celebrate love in front of your nearest and dearest.
But they are also an opportunity for a lot of things to go wrong and result in yourself, your partner and a handful of those nearest and dearest to be immensely stressed.
Bit of light, bit of shade, you know?
But we very rarely get a chance to peek into the chaos of someone else's wedding – and especially not if that wedding features a famous bride and groom.
Watch: Should you have a wishing well at your wedding? Post continues after video.
On Life Uncut this week, Laura Byrne and Matty J (alongside co-host Brittany Hockley) dropped an episode all about the behind-the-scenes of their wedding.
It was jam-packed with insights into how the wedding planning journey went for them (tackling postponements through COVID), how they tried (and failed) to keep their wedding a secret from the paparazzi and even a few details about whether they 'consummated the marriage' on their wedding night.
Here are the six biggest learnings from the podcast episode all about Matty J and Laura's big day.
Laura Byrne's wedding dress drama.
It turns out Laura Byrne very nearly had a very different wedding dress. She was contacted by a brand following her engagement where she was offered a free dress on loan, with the view that there would be content she'd contractually have to share of the gown.
"A very, very, very famous wedding dress designer reached out to me and said they wanted to make me a wedding dress. Their wedding dresses were so expensive, like $20,000. The arrangement was that they would make a dress for me to wear to the ceremony and then I had to get something else for the reception – and it was a loan.
"Like, I had to give the dress back after the wedding – which I was fine with!"
On the podcast, Laura explained that when she went for the first consultation with the brand – which she didn't name throughout the episode – they had already designed an entire dress.
"It was high neck, long-sleeved, very regal dress – like something I would imagine Kate Middleton wearing," she explained on the pod.
She then requested tweaks to be made to the sketches, to fit her vision for what she'd feel comfortable in on the day, which the designer did... But then things got a little awkward.
"It all felt very business-transactional. I got there and it was like 'this is the dress, this is how many posts you need to put on Instagram, this is how much advertising we expect out of it'. My wedding was becoming something I didn't want it to be."
Laura decided to cut ties with the brand saying: "The more time I spent thinking about it, and the more I figured out what I wanted for my wedding, the more I felt icky with the whole thing."
She ended up turning to an old friend, Kyha, who has her own bridal brand – KYHA Studios. It was there that she finally felt like she had her Say Yes To The Dress moment, trying on gowns with her besties around her and falling in love with 'the one'.
"From the dress fittings to having the dress made, the whole time I actually felt like I was the bride. It was an experience for me, not just a business transaction for Instagram."
The dress she eventually chose, as we all now have seen, was a structured ball gown with a fitted sheer bodice and relaxed off-the-shoulder straps.
Matty J wanted to wear pink on the wedding day.
In news that surprised potentially everyone listening to this episode of Life Uncut, Matty J revealed he actually wanted to wear a pink suit to say 'I do' in.
"You wanted to wear a pink suit," Laura said. "And I f**king vetoed that."
He went on to defend his taste by saying: "I wanted to wear something different – and then I saw this pink suit. It wasn't fluorescent pink! It was more of a soft baby pink."
To which Laura and Brittany cackled in response.
Laura not-so-subtly shut down this sartorial choice and Matty ended up wearing a classic navy suit by MJ Bale.
Paparazzi broke into the venue and took pictures from behind a bush.
Laura and Matty were convinced they'd managed to keep the location of their wedding a secret from the press, but when pictures from their wedding ceremony were published mere hours after they exchanged vows, they knew paparazzi had weaselled their way in.
"Our wedding took place at 3pm in the afternoon. By 6:30pm there were already articles out on Daily Mail with very intrusive photos," Laura explained.
While the couple felt violated by the pictures, an aspect that hurt more was that their whole ceremony was voice recorded and shared too – meaning their intimate vows and promises made to each other were published online before they even made it to the reception.
The congregation spotted the articles online and tried to hide it from Matty and Laura, but the bride and groom did eventually see the coverage on their wedding night.
Matty explained that there was one small sliver of silver lining to the invasion of privacy: "I was so glad I didn't see him [the paparazzi]. So glad that he was slightly hidden. Because, in that moment, if we had been exchanging our vows and there was a pap in the carpark, that would have sucked so much. I was thankful we didn't notice him."
Listen to Brittany Hockley and Laura Byrne on No Filter, hosted by Mia Freedman. Post continues after audio.
Why wasn't Brittany Hockley a bridesmaid for Laura Byrne?
In a section dedicated to listener questions, one topic the hosts tackled was something they had "heaps of DMs" about: Why wasn't Brittany a bridesmaid?
For context, Laura and Brittany have been incredibly close friends since starting their podcast three years ago, and often speak about how they never go more than a couple of hours without talking. For some, that would make Brittany a prime bridesmaid candidate. However, Brittany was quick to say that she never expected to be one, nor were there hard feelings about it.
"It did not bother me – and I knew that it wouldn't," she said on air. "We know how much we love each other."
Laura explained that her four bridesmaids were made up of her oldest friends and sister, of whom she was the Maid of Honour at each of their weddings.
Matty and Laura did still give a special role to Brittany on the day, asking her to be their witness signature for their marriage certificate. Brittany joked on air that while this was important, she did sign her name with a little 'kiss kiss' on their official certificate.
Brittany shared a kiss with Matty J's cousin during the wedding.
Matty and Laura joked about plonking Brittany on the elusive 'Singles Table' at the wedding in the hope that she'd meet a nice boy there. But while that may have started as a joke, that actually ended up happening!
The trio explained on the podcast that Brittany got a little cosy with one of Matty J's cousins, and they ended up sharing a snog at the reception.
"I had one sneaky little kiss," Brittany admitted on the podcast.
However, Brittany confessed she doesn't think it will lead to anything long-term – giving a hilarious reason why while gesturing to Matty J:
"It makes it awkward, cos he looks way too much like you!"
Matty J and Laura talk about consummating their marriage.
Newlyweds often feel the pressure to have sex on their wedding night – tapping into the tradition of consummating the marriage as soon as possible. But in reality, many couples don't end up doing it the night of. Why? Well, it's a big day!
This is pretty much what happened to Matty J and Laura.
"We had 10 people come back to our accommodation for kick-ons – a little after party. And at about 1am I said to Matt, 'come on, let's go to bed'. I thought we'd go downstairs and, you know, get to fourth base – but then we got downstairs and he was like 'it is absolutely not happening'."
But they did share on the podcast that they did eventually get around to sealing the deal two days after the wedding. Laughing that they probably "just did missionary and maybe a bit of doggy" during that session, the pair then questioned whether their marriage was void because they took so long to have sex.
"The wedding is essentially annulled now! The wedding is a sham!"
Brittany, Laura and Matty J all go into much more detail in their hour and half-long podcast episode devoted to recapping their wedding, so if you want to hear directly from them, you can have a listen here.
Image: Alex Marks Photography and Instagram.
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