1. All of the signs that suggest Kylie Jenner is in labour right now (and one that she isn’t).
Those engrossed in the status of Kylie Jenner’s uterus were given a most rigorous run around today when reports came in that she was in labour.
Firstly there was a rogue Snapchat from maybe-dad Travis Scott with what looked like the ceiling of an airplane with the caption “Make it home to ya one way or another,” as in the baby is coming and I got to go go go.
Cue thousands upon thousands of fans trying to dig up the dirt.
Next, reports came in with suspected Kylie sightings from hospital staff (what confidentiality agreement?). That, mixed with the continued quiet social media feeds of the Kardashian clan, was enough to tip the situation into delirium.
However, as quickly as this house of cards was built up, it also came crashing down. Host Sophie Julia immediately backtracked, and an eagle-eyed fan realised that the image from Travis Scott’s Instagram was actually from last December.
So… for those still with us… in summary: Not in labour (most likely), probably pregnant… we think.
2. Floyd Mayweather’s thoughts on #MeToo are so hopelessly stupid they’re actually funny.
Surprise! Floyd Mayweather - ahem, convicted woman basher - thought #MeToo was about fast cars and jet planes.
In an interview with Men’s Health editor Jordyn Taylor, Mayweather - the spokesperson for all things good and feminist - was asked about the #MeToo movement.
It went like this...
MH: We're asking a lot of men, in light of the #MeToo movement, how men can grow in 2018.
FM: The who?
MH: The #MeToo movement. Women speaking out about sexual assault.
FM: When you say “me too” … When somebody is like, “I got a Rolls Royce, I be like ‘me too.’” When somebody say they got a private jet, I say, “Me too. I got two. Me too.”
MH: This is a very different —
FM: Well, I didn’t know! My Me Too movement from the beginning was whenever somebody said what they have I’m like, “me too.” Somebody say they got a billion dollars, I say, “I made a billion dollars, me too.”
Oh, right. Haha. Awesome. A billion dollars? #MeToo!
When pressed, Mayweather went on to say, "You know, sexual harassment, I don't think it's cool at all."
But hitting women? Oh, he seems to be just fine with that.
3. Turns out Ewan McGregor's ex-wife wasn't too thrilled about his Golden Globes speech.
On Monday, while much of the world celebrated the #TimesUp movement on the Golden Globes red carpet, another speech made headlines for another reason: Ewan McGregor managed to thank his ex-wife and new girlfriend in the same speech.
"I want to take a moment to just say thank you to Eve, who always stood by me for 22 years," he said.
"And my four children, Clara, Esther, Jamyan and Anouk- I love you."
Just moments later, McGregor thanked his new girlfriend.
"There would have been no Ray without Mary Elizabeth Winstead, so thank you very much."
After 22 years of marriage, McGregor and Eve Mavrakis, a production manager whom he met on set in 1995, revealed they had separated in October when news that McGregor had started dating his Fargo co-star, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, broke.
But while everyone was clapping on behalf of McGregor, cheering his good guy status, his ex-wife wasn't as thrilled.
"No, I did not like his speech," she said, when approached by the Daily Mail this week.
Why not?
"For the same reasons you are here asking me about it," she replied.
Because sometimes, fewer words pack a greater punch.
4. Taylor Swift's new music video has dropped. Do with that what you will.
Oh.
Taylor Swift has just dropped a new video and, well, it's all very Taylor Swift of her.
First of all, the whole song seems to be about her "bad reputation" and her "big enemies" and, dear God Tay Tay, we've heard all this before.
There's a lot of your normal music clip stuff going on - a yacht, some backup dancers, a 'club'.
But this video has two things we haven't seen in a TSwift clip before.
A cameo from Future, who looks just as confused as we are that he's ended up in a Taylor Swift song and a cameo from a rapping Ed Sheeran.
Yep, a rapping Ed Sheeran... in da club.
Looks like we've already hit peak 2018.
You can view the video in all its glory right here.
LISTEN: Taylor Swift has a new image, and we need to talk about it... Post continues after audio.
5. The Portsea Polo outfit we cannot stop staring at.
What's gold on the bottom, purple and green all over and glistens in the sun as she walks?
Clementine McVeigh at this year's Portsea Polo.
The model and wife to AFL's Jarrad McVeigh was a sparkling, glittering vision at the event on Saturday and her very extra sunglasses and gold turban weren't even the best part.
And we've got all the details of her sparkly garb right this way.
LISTEN: Tracey Spicer joins Holly Wainwright and Rachel Corbett to deep dive on why the #metoo movement has kick-started a new way of thinking worldwide.