'I had nothing left': MasterChef winner Julie Goodwin's private battle with mental health.

This post deals with depression and anxiety. If you are struggling with your mental health, support is available via Lifeline. Please call 13 11 14.

MasterChef Australia winner and Star 104.5 breakfast host, Julie Goodwin, has shared details of her difficult battle with mental health.

The Facebook page for her breakfast radio show, Rabbit and Julie, shared a note yesterday, in which she explained that she has been largely absent over the past year due to the symptoms of depression and anxiety, for which she is currently receiving help.

Julie Goodwin talks about work life and motherhood. Post continues below.

“I’ve had depression and anxiety on and off over many years. On the surface I know I don’t seem to be depressed or anxious. I’ve denied it to myself for a long time, and certainly put a lot of energy into making sure it wasn’t obvious to the people around me,” she wrote.

“Six months ago I reluctantly decided to acknowledge that my mental health wasn’t great and I finally allowed myself to be diagnosed… and put on medication.”

‘A whole list of things went wrong.’

Over the past few years, Goodwin has been operating her own business, Julie’s Place Cooking School, while also starring on the Central Coast radio show, Rabbit and Julie Goodwin, with co-host, Dave ‘Rabbit’ Rabbetts.

After four years on the program, Goodwin announced her resignation in December 2019, citing she needed to focus on family and her wellbeing, with her regular appearances on the show ending in Easter 2020.

“It’s with real sadness that I’ve made the difficult decision to step away from my breakfast role, but I’ve had to weigh up my family, my cooking school and life balance priorities, and hope I’m doing the right thing,” Goodwin said in a statement at the time.

However, in her new letter, the mother-of-three wrote that both her anxiety and depression escalated during the Christmas period last year.

"The Christmas break came around, usually a time of rest and healing and restocking the energy bank. This year was different. A whole list of things went wrong, and I just didn’t have the resources to deal with any of it," Goodwin wrote.

"I was physically sick in the guts for weeks, my mouth and nose full of ulcers, my hands wouldn’t stop shaking. Emotionally I was just spent. Anxiety kept coursing through me like electricity. I felt like I was trapped under a wet woollen blanket and every move was a massive effort."

She shared that, eventually, she hit a breaking point.

"All of this became so much that I just had nothing left. No joy, no excitement. I couldn’t see a single thing to look forward to, and putting a smile on my face involved remembering which muscles to use and arranging them properly," she wrote.

She explained that this period was the "darkest place" she's ever been. The pressure of going back to work at both the radio show and cooking school was when "the wheels fell off".

It then when her husband of 25 years, Mick, realised she needed medical support.

"My beautiful husband Mick, the person who loves me most, recognised the crisis I was in and took me to the emergency room. I was referred to what’s known as the acute care team, who referred me to a psychiatrist, who recommended in-patient care in a mental health unit," she continued.

"And that’s where I am, and have been for more than five weeks now."

Goodwin shared that it was time she publically opened up about her mental health battle, not only to lift the weight off her own shoulders but to remind others that getting help is a step in the right direction.

She wrote, "I don’t think I’m out of the ordinary, to be honest. I’d just like you to have a quick squiz at your life, your workload, your family and friends, and ask - is it working for me? Or is it just working me into the ground?"

And if so, "ask for help. Do it before you can no longer hear the logical voices, the clear and good voices. Do it before it’s too hard to see a way forward. If you won’t do it for yourself, do it for the ones who love you the most."

If you think you may be experiencing depression or another mental health problem, please contact your general practitioner.

If you're based in Australia, please contact Lifeline 13 11 14 for immediate support or beyondblue 1300 22 4636.

Feature image: Supplied.