I’ve always struggled with shyness and introversion. I love being alone with a good book, and if I do socialise, it’s usually to catch up one-on-one with a friend.
But now that I am a mother, I’ve had to make a huge effort to make it less about “me time” and more about giving my children a rich, interesting life full of people and places.
Recently, I realised that I was relying too much on my very extroverted husband to break the ice for me – and he showed me this by doing nothing at all. Jeff is often described as “the life of the party”. He has the magical ability to chat with any person and find common ground.
He can crack up a room in seconds, because he moonlights as a stand-up comedian. He genuinely loves being around people, whereas I am more likely to get annoyed or frustrated and then scurry back to my hermit hole.
In big social situations like parties or weddings – events that would usually stress me out – Jeff is my secret weapon. I will coast behind his wave of extroversion, and thus enjoy the occasion and observe people, without having the pressure to chat or ‘perform’. There are definitely huge benefits to the introvert-extrovert partnership.
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Top Comments
I am an introvert - married to an even bigger introvert. It’s so hard when I have to be the one to make conversation with people so we don’t seem completely rude and weird.
I totally understand feeling like a weirdo and not fitting in. I am a singer songwriter so people assume I must be extroverted because I perform. My first husband - total extrovert and I road on his coattails for years. He was like the "cool kid" and I felt like that took me places. However, I eventually learned how to fake extroversion without his help. I can do it and I do it well and even enjoy myself but I am usually exhausted after. I crave that alone time and need it to recharge. My 2nd husband... more introverted than me so I tend to lead us when we go out although he has his extroverted moments when he is passionate about something. We have to be so careful about overscheduling ourselves and having a balance....so hard to do in a world that is made up of mostly extroverts wanting to socialize at what feels like at's frenzied pace We are often misunderstood. I feel like this is finally getting voiced and talked about!