real life

Woman who had her whole life planned finds herself selling her engagement ring on eBay.

27-year-old Laura thought she had her whole life planned out: she had a fiancé, a 1.35-carat engagement ring, a house and an adorable pug puppy.

Her fiancé even had a new best buddy, named Brad, who he seemed very happy to spend lots of time with.

Things were looking great. Until Laura realised that her fiancé and Brad were…more than friends…

via GIPHY

Enter, the most hilarious eBay listing to ever exist.

Now that the wedding is most definitely off, Laura is looking to off-load the ring to the next lucky lady, and she’s got a hell of a way of telling the story of how she came to be “in my pajamas alone in the middle of the afternoon on a Friday ” auctioning off her diamonds.

laura ring
This ring has as many secrets as it does sparkles. Image via eBay.
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"So, you know when you're engaged to be married and then suddenly your fiancé starts spending a little too much time with his friend, Brad?" Laura begins.

"And you're like, 'Hey, it's okay, Brad's a great guy. He's pretty buff and he's a laugh and his fashion sense is amazing'.

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"So then your fiancé starts not coming home at night because he and Brad had a 'wild one' and he comes back walking a little bit like John Wayne at 4pm the next day and you think 'Wow! It must have been a wild one since he can't walk straight anymore. 'They must have had a lot of good, clean fun together'."

Things got more bizarre when Laura found a pair of bright pink stilettos (in a size 11), a blonde wig, a dress and a worn pair of stockings.

ring and wig
Pictured: BLONDE WIG. Oh, and ring is also pictured... Image via eBay.
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Then, her husband-to-be stopped wanting to have sex.

"Despite the fact you have a great rack and an ass that Kim K would insure for £8million by mistaking it for her own and you're wondering what is wrong with you," she wrote.

So now, Laura finds herself here.

Selling an 18-carat white gold Marquise cut diamond that has "lots of sexy little diamonds".

Also, "single, living with my ex-fiancé because we're both too skint to move out with the rock the size of Gibraltar on my finger wondering, 'How many other men have I turned?' whilst sharing a tub of ice cream with my dog."

ring and dog
Dog not included (sad face). Image via eBay.
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Too real, Laura. TOO REAL.

Importantly, Laura also notes that the ring can be resized, as it's currently a size J.

"J for JOKES I ALMOST MARRIED SOMEONE WHO BLATANTLY LOVES THE D, AND THAT'S OKAY IF THAT'S WHAT HE WANTS TO DO, TO EACH HIS OWN, BUT IT'S NOT WHAT I'M ABOUT AS I'M ONLY 27 AND I'D LOVE TO HAVE SEX AGAIN AT SOME POINT."

At least Laura has a sense of humour about it all.

Plus, the current bid is sitting at AU$7,600, so she'll at least make a bit of money, too.