couples

"My fiance's grandma left me an engagement ring, but it's not what I want."

A fiance has taken to Reddit to ask for advice on a tricky situation she has found herself in since becoming engaged. The woman, who fittingly goes by the name guiltandrings, had been with her fiance for four years prior to their engagement.

guiltandrings explains that her partner proposed with a ‘placeholder ring’ just something she could wear in the mean time until they decided on a real ring together.

Speaking of the placeholder ring, she explains, “It’s a ring that is just perfectly “me” and I love it. It even includes fake little stones of the type of coloured stone I love, because in the past I have said how it is my favourite colour and stone, as well as my birthstone. It means a lot to me that my fiancé remembered that. But the ring isn’t suitable for every day wear, and we have begun looking at “real” rings together.”

"We have begun looking at "real" rings together." Image via iStock.
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Smooth sailing so far. The woman goes on to explain she is very excited and now has the kind of ring she has wanted since she was a kid.

But there's one big problem.

The woman says, "His grandma (lovely woman) passed away last month, and unbeknownst to me, she left her ring to my fiancé to give to me. It is a diamond, and while lovely, it isn't really... What I want... I feel like garbage just typing this, but I have never really seen the appeal of diamonds."

Oh dear.

WATCH how to buy the right engagement ring. Post continues after video...

Video via CBS Money News

She goes on, "However I am also honoured they'd even consider giving such a sentimental ring to me. I am very into sentimental things, and for the last eight years I have been wearing my great-great grandma's diamond ring (on the other hand, and different finger) for such reason. I feel like a hypocrite to deny HIS grandma's ring. Thing is, for my own engagement ring I thought it would be something I could pick. I fear all the rings I'll ever have will be grandma rings?"

guiltandrings says her fiance is unphased and just wants her to be happy. But he is concerned about how his mum will react to the ring being turned down. "I love his mum, so this is making me feel so guilty. I love his entire family, they are fantastic to me and welcoming, so I feel like an asshole now. I talked to my fiancé about it, asking if maybe the ring could go to his sister or his niece instead, but apparently the grandma left it to him to give to me, and that is what he thinks his mum will focus on," she says.

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"I fear all the rings I'll ever have will be grandma rings?" Image via iStock.

The fiance now feels she is in a tricky situation, explaining, "As much as I love the (coloured stone) type ring, I am not sure if I should die on this hill. Honestly there are more important things in the world than a ring. I am also not sure if this is something I have to give in to though? I really was looking forward to this... I feel like I am in a hard spot."

Unsurprisingly she is full of questions. "Do I accept the grandma's ring? Or do I get the ring I want and hope his mum is okay about it? Is there another option? Thoughts? What do I do?" she concludes.

What advice would you offer?

TAP ON THE IMAGE for 17 nontraditional engagement rings for a unique bride-to-be...