weddings

All the ways gen Z are getting married differently to millennials.

If you don't want to feel the sting of public shaming, then definitely don't search "cringe millennial wedding" on TikTok.

In this niche of content, you'll find commentary on the very specific traditions and stylistic choices that make millennial nuptials cliche. Including but not limited to:

Naked cakes.

Creative seating charts.

'Candid' (staged) group photos.

Elaborate venues with 'fairytale vibes'.

Planning things for the ~vibes~, in general.

Watch: Mia Freedman shares what her wedding day was really like. Post continues below.


Video via MM.

For Gen-Z, many of whom are entering the era of engagement announcements and first-time bridesmaid duties, weddings are about to look very different.

Events that look like they're straight off a Pinterest board are out. The highly curated 'perfect day'? No more.

Apparently those things give people the "ick" now, and we know, it's a little hard to hear.

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Don't get us wrong, though. Gen-Z couples are still heading down the aisle — only the self-aware generation are doing it more... consciously.

Coming out of a pandemic and into a cost-of-living crisis, they have different priorities. We're in a time where a wedding regularly costs as much as a house deposit, and many are questioning whether that's a good investment. 

Ebony, 25, married high school sweetheart Callum in a casual surprise wedding. Reflecting on the day, she said the pair wouldn't change a thing about their relaxed approach.

After Callum popped the question, they got married at what guests had been told was their engagement party. The couple pulled the event together in just three weeks.

"The price was probably the biggest factor as to why we had a surprise wedding," Ebony said.

"We decided we would rather go on a few epic honeymoons than spend every cent we have on one day. It cost us probably a quarter of the price of most traditional weddings these days, but to us it was absolutely perfect."

Chloe Elliot, the Director of the popular Australian wedding directory and blog Ivory Tribe, said Gen Z are looking for ways to incorporate meaning into their day that resonates with them, particularly when it comes to the ceremony.

"We found millennials would not necessarily have a desire for much agency over their ceremony, whereas now, couples lean on their suppliers to show that beyond the legalities, a ceremony can be whatever feels right for them," she said.

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"It's all about the (seemingly) unscripted, un-staged feels and less about the seamless perfection."

This more candid, raw approach also ties in with this cohort's preferred aesthetic on social media. 

We're seeing a rise in things like film photography and Super 8 video to capture weddings, rather than the "cinematic" photoshoot style we've become used to in recent years, said Elliot.

"Couples are seeking a sense of raw nostalgia in the way the day is portrayed, reminiscent of 90s family videos and Polaroid photo albums," she added.

"Content creators who lean into this idea of gathering immediate, unfiltered moments are huge right now."

We're seeing less staged photography and more in-the-moment footage. Image: Getty.

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The photos from Ebony and Callum's reception, which took place in a small hall they rented on a property, look like something you'd see at a club — all flash photography and moments of rapture caught on camera — and that's just the way they wanted it.

"The indoor hall was a dedicated dance floor, which I don't think anyone stepped off the entire night," said Ebony. 

There was no father-daughter dance. No big speeches. No sit-down meal.

"Wedding traditions were always something we knew we would skip on," she continued.

"At the end of the day we knew marrying each other was going to be special regardless of what we did. We thought there's absolutely no need to sugarcoat our day because 'tradition' says so... We cut a cake that we all got too drunk to eat, that's as far as our traditions went."

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Wedding celebrant Jemma Ryan said she's seen a big shift to elopements recently, as well as micro weddings with less than 25 guests. 

"They're really doing their day their way," she said.

"Rising financial pressures [are one reason], but I tend it think it has more to do with not wanting to be bound by tradition and expectations of others - parents in particular."

For the first true online natives, stung by the digital footprint of their predecessors, there's also the risk of over-exposure. Of appearing to try too hard.

That might be why Gen Z celebrities such as Millie Bobby Brown, who married Jake Bonjiovi in a secret ceremony in May, are choosing to reveal so little of their big day online. 

Millie Bobby Brown and husband Jake Bonjiovi. Image: Instagram/@milliebobbybrown

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It seems counterintuitive, that a group known for oversharing is holding back on — well, sharing. 

But Gen Z know we're in an era where anything can go viral for the wrong reasons. Being seen as "cringe" is the ultimate no-no. From bad wedding vowels to a questionable mother-groom dance — everything is up for commentary.

Authenticity is also valued above all else, especially when it comes to social media. It makes sense that young people want to tie the knot in a way that feels real, rather than performative.

But we can't blame their elders for wanting to pull off the "perfect" wedding, and the lengths they went to in order to do so.

Millennials were the first generation to face the pressure of sharing their weddings across social media — from the all-important first post after the big day on Instagram to those tagged Facebook photo albums for the family.

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They were also the first generation to source inspiration online, turning to image-aggregating sites like Pinterest and Tumblr to define their ideal aesthetic. 

And they were the first customers of modern bridal magazines such as Hello May and Together Journal, which set the bar high with aspirational — yet achievable — 'real wedding' inspiration.

In the mid-2000s, weddings started becoming about the content. Which led to a booming industry that capitalised on the appetite for bespoke experiences worthy of "sharing".

In the pursuit of the perfect millennial wedding, no detail was spared; whether it was the embossed acrylic signage or the individually iced cookies with guests' names on them. 

The Instagram posts became exhaustive, the lists of tagged suppliers reading like movie credits.

All of this put extra pressure on couples heading to the altar to execute an event worthy of the time, money, effort and eyeballs. Because now it wasn't just their nearest and dearest watching them tie the knot — now the world was watching.

Gen Z know the world's watching, but they care a lot less about what they think. 

Or at least they want to appear that way.

Have you noticed a shift in the way people are tying the knot? Share your thoughts in the comments below.

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