In my practice I see a lot of women who tell me: there is something wrong with me, I can’t have an orgasm when I have sex with my partner. I have no problem on my own, but with my partner it just doesn’t happen.
I am always surprised how many people are unaware of the fact that only between 20 per cent of women can achieve an orgasm by penetrative sex alone.
The majority of women need clitoral stimulation to climax, which can be achieved by the touching, rubbing, caressing or pressing of the clitoris by their partner’s fingers or their own. Oral sex is another highly pleasurable way because of the direct focus on the clitoris.
So what does the clitoris look like? It turns out, it is not just a little “button”. Our own Dr Helen O’Connell, a urology surgeon in Melbourne published a paper in The Journal of Urology in 1998 where she argued that the clitoris is much larger than previously thought.
The larger part is hidden inside the pelvic area. The external “head” is attached to the internal body which is divided into clitoral “legs” that could be as long as nine centimetres. These wrap around the vagina and the urethra and, like the penis, they swell with blood when aroused.
It is really time that both men and women learn more about the only female body part that exists purely for pleasure. The Museum of Sex in New York has a brilliant website showing all the information about the clitoris you can possible find, and this amusing educational video from sex educator Betty Dodson will make you smile.