The death of the Ellis twins is tragic. But it has nothing to do with abortion.

Heather Ellis is sharing her grief – but she is also sharing a very dangerous message.

Content warning: This post contains confronting images that may be distressing.

In November 2014, Heather Ellis unexpectedly went into labour.

She had only been pregnant for 22 weeks. She gave birth to two sons, whom she named Chase and Cooper. The boys lived for 30 minutes before passing away in their parents’ arms.

It’s a tragic story. One that far too many women will relate to. There is no getting over a pain that deep – it becomes a part of who you are.

This month, nine months after the birth of her sons, Heather Ellis posted some very intimate photos of her sons and asked that her message be shared widely.

But it wasn’t a message about her grief. It was a message about abortion.

Heather wrote:

On her new blog, Heather described her birth experience in more detail, saying that her doctors had told her that her sons would not survive and offered her an abortion. Heather, a devout Church of Later Day Saints Mormon, refused.

Heather wrote:

When the doctors first saw that my cervix was shortening and the chance for delivering healthy babies was low, they offered my husband and I an abortion. They told us we could just end the pregnancy right there, quick and simple. It broke my heart to even hear it, because I knew we would never do that….We gave them every chance to survive, but in the end it was up to our Heavenly Father and He needed them back home with Him. We prayed for a miracle, but sometimes God answers our prayers in unexpected ways :)

Heather’s story was picked up by anti-abortion campaigners across the world.

Bristol Palin (daughter of conservative American politician, Sarah Palin) shared Heather’s story saying “How can we let anyone say that babies like this do not have the right to life!?! These are clearly and indisputably human beings! God bless this sweet mama for telling her story. I know that God will use the short lives of her two precious boys to inspire other mother’s to choose life!”

While there is no doubt that Heather Ellis’ plea has come from a place of kindness, the way that her story has been used by anti-abortion campaigners is disappointing and misleading.

Firstly, Heather Ellis and her partner made the decision that was right for her and her family. But what has been lost in this discussion is the fact that other women are also entitled to make choices that are right for them. The Ellis family made their own decisions, free from the judgement of others – and that same right should be extended to all families and all women.

Secondly, associating these images with abortion implies that women who terminate their pregnancies aren’t entirely aware of the consequences of their actions. Women understand the gravity of their decisions – to suggest otherwise is deeply offensive. Waving images of babies in women’s faces achieves nothing except making women feel bad about themselves (and for some reason, it seems to make anti-choice campaigners feel better about their own life choices).

Thirdly, the vast majority of abortions in Australia take place before 12 weeks gestation and almost all before 24 weeks. There are significant legislative safeguards in place for the terminations that are required in these unique later cases, including in some states the oversight of two medical practitioners. Heather and other anti-choice campaigners are talking about a “problem” that doesn’t exist.

Fourthly, using tragic images in this way is manipulative and ultimately very dangerous. Opponents seize on images like Heather’s to justify bans on abortion – and those bans have fatal consequences. Every ten minutes, a woman dies because she can’t get an abortion. Over 47,000 women die every year because legal restrictions keep them from accessing the abortion care they need.

Finally, and perhaps most importantly, Heather’s story has nothing to do with abortion. She was offered an abortion as part of her medical treatment after being told her children would not survive. Her story is very sad, but is immaterial to whether another women could and should make a different decision. It’s simple scaremongering, designed to distress and demonise women seeking abortions and the doctors who perform them legally, responsibly and safely.

Heather has said, “I wanted people to connect a face to their unborn foetus.” But the fact is that women aren’t terminating late term pregnancies willy-nilly because they haven’t seen pictures of babies who have passed away. Women are more than capable of understanding their own decisions when it comes to their health, safety and well-being, without judgement from people who do not understand their individual circumstances.

Heather is undoubtedly helping a lot of women by sharing her grief – but she is NOT helping women by allowing her story to be used as an argument to limit women’s ability to make decisions about their own bodies.

Read more:

‘Abortion is hard enough. We need to stop harassment outside abortion clinics.’

A very different kind of abortion story.

“I know my abortion was the right choice.”

Do you think Heather is helping other women by allowing her story to be used by anti-abortion campaigners?