"Does it make coffee and raise your children too?"

By JO ABI

Ironing sucks. There’s just no two ways about it. It’s actually worse than vacuuming. Ironing is NOT fun, I don’t get ANY satisfaction out of doing it and if I could get away with it I wouldn’t ever iron, EVER. It doesn’t help that I have a too-low ironing board and an iron that leaks water.

At one point I noticed most of my wardrobe didn’t need ironing. It was bliss. I was naturally buying clothes made from fabrics that just needed a wash and a shake. Then, my son started school.

Ironing is now a weekly requirement but my ironing activity is minimal and reluctant. I iron only when I have to. My husband doesn’t wear business shirts anymore thank goodness (he’s a truck driver now) and I just don’t see the point of ironing his hi viz (high visibility work wear). It’s just going to become covered in grease and petrol.

And speaking of chores I’ll do anything to avoid, I am the world’s most reluctant vacuum-er. My actual vacuum cleaner needs to be cleaned. It’s old and encrusted in dirt. It needs some spray-and-wipe, but I can’t be bothered to do that either. It’s one of those fancy vacuum cleaners with lots of crevices. How am I meant to clean that? I’d need cotton buds. Do I sound like the kind of person who’ll clean my vacuum cleaner with cotton buds? I really need to get a new one, a red one. That would be so brilliant.

I bought a huge rug for my living room and lay it out across the carpet. Now instead of vacuuming I just shake the rug out. My children always dramatically close their eyes when I do this because there are so many bits of food and dust on it they could possibly be blinded if they look directly at it while I shake. Sometimes I even crawl around creating little piles of food and dust and pick it all up – while watching The Good Wife or MKR.

Our toilet is never scrubbed. What for? All you have to do is pop one of those blue tablets into the cistern and a. it looks clean and b. all grime is hidden and magically washed away with each flush. What’s the point of scrubbing it with a disgusting brush?

If your toilet is really dirty you can just pop two tablets into the cistern. It’s like magic. It’s brilliant.

There are plenty of other chores I manage to avoid (clearing cobwebs, sorting out the fridge, polishing the windows) but I feel the need to list some chores I DO manage to do. If I had the right equipment I’d probably do it – one of those cobweb brooms, a squidgy for the window, a bucket with wheels.

We all have chores we’ll do anything to avoid. Come on, fess up. There’re different for everyone, just like our fingerprints are unique, so are our chore-phobias. When it comes to the chores you try to avoid you might need to invest in the right equipment.

Electrolux has an awesome vacuum cleaner I’ve got my eye on. It is an Electrolux so it goes without saying that it will be brilliant. Best thing is it is red, which means it matches my kettle, toaster and car. This is important. It’s all about accessorising your home.
Just kidding.

Flicking through their catalogue trying to be inspired to vacuum, I was pretty impressed with blurbs like, “UltraCaptic bagless vacuum cleaner”, “innovative ‘compact & go’ dirt disposal system” and “fuss-free”. Gosh, does it make coffee and raise your children too.

It’s definitely time for a vacuum cleaner upgrade and this is definitely the one for me. Not only am I going to enjoy vacuuming; it is going to be so great living in a cleaner home.

Coping with dust clouds, re-vacuuming spilled dirt and handling tangles of hair with bare hands are now things of the past. The new Electrolux UltraCaptic bagless vacuum cleaner features an innovative “compact & go” dirt disposal system, making the chore of post vacuuming clean-up a more enjoyable and fuss-free affair.

Thanks to the UltraCaptic’s “Compact and Go” dirt disposal system, the vacuum squishes the dirt, dust and contents into a compressed form that drops neatly into the bin without any fuss. Compacting the dust also means more areas can be cleaned before emptying the vacuum. 

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Do you procrastinate and put off doing chores?  What motivates you to do housework?