Crying after sex is actually a thing and it's not just me.

After years, YEARS, of thinking that I was crazy – a raging hormonal mess – I have just learned that no, you silly goose, crying after sex is actually totally normal.

For those of you not accustomed to this weepy routine, allow me to paint you a picture from my last relationship.

So, I’d be there, literally knocked into a sex coma from the existential orgasm I’d just experienced, still lying on top of my then-boyfriend (the absolute love of my life at the time), with him still inside me, when suddenly I would be hit with a tsunami of emotions.

Watch: What is cuckolding? Sexologist Chantelle Otten explains. Post continues after video.

Because, as if I was witnessing an active volcano, my feelings would just erupt ALL OVER THE PLACE with no sign of slowing down. It was like the peak of my climax would release gigantic flood gates and EVERYTHING would be happening all at once. 

It was like shaking up a two-litre bottle of Coke and unscrewing the cap.

I would feel all the feelings, all at the same time, and it was A LOT (in case you couldn’t tell by the shouty capitals). 

I was just so in love, and I was just so completely spent and eternally satisfied that every single time I would find myself mentally uttering the same thing while tears filled my eyes.

‘I could die right now and be totally okay with that.’ 

Like I said – crazy, right?

But it turns out that this influx of feelings is actually a thing. It’s called post-coital dysphoria and I’m not the only one who feels it.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Normal (@normalco)

What is post-coital dysphoria? 

“If you regularly find yourself crying during or after sex, or even feeling depressed or anxious for no reason after sex, you may be experiencing post-coital dysphoria (PCD),” wrote sexual wellness brand NORMAL in an online guide to why we cry when we climax.

“It’s an umbrella term that can be used to refer to, basically, any unexpected negative emotion that occurs after sex, from anxiety to anger to depression.”

Like, you know, welling up while your partner is still inside you. Awks.

But according to a study published in Sexual Medicine, 46 per cent of women surveyed said they’d experienced PCD symptoms at least once in their lifetime, while a University of Queensland report found similar stats in women and men.

Why does it happen?

The million dollar question that’s still got scientists stumped is: why? It may have something to do with genetics, past trauma or even just being “highly emotionally reactive” (guilty as charged).

Listen to the hosts of Mamamia Out Loud discuss the dirty details of Gwyneth Paltrow's sex life. Post continues after podcast.

“In the period following sexual intercourse, individuals who are emotionally reactive may be more sensitive or vulnerable to negative emotions, resulting in an acute period of depression or irritability,” said the authors of the study, which was published in Sexual Medicine.

“There is no singular, correct way to have sex.”

But while tearing up after sex may be common, if you’re worried about your post-coital feelings, help is available.

“We want to encourage you to explore the emotions you feel after sex and see if there are any underlying experiences that might be informing them,” shared the NORMAL experts. 

“If you’ve previously had a negative or traumatic experience around sex, and you find it affecting your feelings or emotions towards sex now, it may be worth speaking to a mental health professional for support.” 

As we know, sex – even just with ourselves – can be an emotionally charged act that can see us tapping into our deepest needs, wants and fantasies. 

“It’s not surprising to us that sometimes these strong feelings can erupt in other ways,” reads the guide.

“But so long as you’re taking care of your physical and mental health, we firmly believe that there’s no singular, correct way to have sex – even if it does occasionally end with a tear or two.”

Image: Getty + Mamamia.