“Can’t you read?” she screams. My eyes close for the three seconds it takes to prepare for whatever is to come next, and to consider how I might deal with it. I look across the playground and spy the target; 40 metres away an elderly woman, the kind who still wears a hat and tweed coat, is walking with her fluffy miniature puppy. I’m racking my brain now. What is she doing wrong? She is not trespassing, not littering, not jay walking…
“I SAID” the voice bellows, “Can’t you read?” The elderly woman stops and looks over at us. “The sign clearly says ‘No Dogs Permitted Off The Lead’ You should be in jail!” The woman looks horrified for a brief moment, then registers that the booming authoritarian voice belongs to my angelic doll-eyed, then 4 year old daughter.
I attempt to give the woman a ‘kids say the darndest things’ smile, and she seems to accept this. I guess at what she is thinking, or will be talking about with her neighbour back at home though, “How rude” or “How peculiar that a child should be so concerned about my little dog” or perhaps “How would a child that age even know how to read that sign?”, and of course, “What sort of mother has she?” There will be plenty of tongue clicking.
My own thought is stock standard: If only I could smile, say ‘Asperger’s’ and all would be understood.
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Great article. I can really appreciate what has been written as I have a 5 year old who is on the spectrum. Our life is full of visual schedules, social stories, social role play scenarios, thought bubble talk and lots of preparation if things are different in our day. This is our norm. Our latest (well really every week for close to 8 months) is when I go through drive through for a treat after her OT appointment, I ask for a hash brown, they say it will be $2 and please drive-through, daughter asks "what did he say"' I tell her what they said (that will be $2 please drive through) and everything is fine and she is happy. If this what helps her make sense of her world I'm there to help. There is so much to take on as a 5 year old but she is improving daily. I still have to say to her "hey are my eyes on the wall or on the ground?" when she doesn't have eye contact, but she then moves her head so she has some eye contact, it may only last for a few secs but i can see she is trying so hard. Yes some people don't understand, I get comments "geez she will get dizzy" as she is spinning around at bakers delight. Funny thing though its the same woman that say that... Or this other time I was asked what I give her as she was running up an aisle is Aldi. But the cutest thus far is when I told her to be gentle of the eggs in the trolley (I touched the egg box to show her what I meant), I turned around and there she was on the floor stroking all the egg cartons calling them pets. This taking "literal" to a whole new meaning. I used to feel i had to explain to ppl about my girl, but now i dont care what others think. i love my quirky girl, she brings so much joy into my life.
As a teacher, who works with an increasing number of children on the Autism spectrum each year, I so thoroughly related to this article. It made me smile, as do the many children I teach. Please know that there are more and more people who understand your daughter every day. We may not really comprehend everything she does but we do understand when you say the word "Aspergers". I know it is probably hard to feel like you have to explain her words and actions all the time but remember, every time you explain to another person, that means that they will understand a little more.