Is it time for us all to get a bit more open about the baby naming process?
One of the longstanding traditions around babies is that you don’t tell everyone the name you’ve chosen until after the birth. Well, I’m not really big on tradition.
With our first child, my husband and I decided on the name years before she was born. With our second, who we knew was going to be a boy, we couldn’t decide.
Halfway through the pregnancy, I was having a party for my 40th birthday. I came up with the idea of putting together a shortlist of the names we were considering and getting our friends to pick their favourites. In the end we had about 20 names on the list. My brother-in-law, a passionate Labor supporter, insisted we include Kevin, while my two-year-old daughter wanted to put forward a few suggestions of her own, including the Play School-inspired Humpty and Scrap. (There were also plenty of acceptable names, like Finn, Zachary, Parker and Jethro.)
As well, my secret favourite was on the list. I hadn't pushed hard for it, because it was a bit different, but it was the name I really wanted.
Our friends numbered the 20 or so names in order of preference and then put their votes into a ballot box. At the end of the party we read out the number one picks. Friend after friend had picked my secret favourite. (I have friends with excellent taste).
The whole thing was just meant to be a bit of fun, but it gave me the confidence to really push for my favourite, and that's the name we ended up choosing.
I know it's traditional for the naming process to be a private matter between the parents, but there are benefits to putting potential names out there before you decide on one. That way, people are more likely to give you their honest thoughts (which you can choose to take on board or ignore). You'll also find out about any negative associations before it's too late.