On Tuesday, former Bachelorette Ali Oetjen was attacked by trolls for a photo she shared on Instagram.
After Ali posted two selfies with a freshly made-up face, the hate came thick and fast – with several Instagram users criticising the image for the way she edited it and labelled her “fake”.
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“Why does this picture look like a cartoon? You are already way more naturally beautiful than most people with out all this extreme photoshop crap. What you are actually doing is feeding a false reality and affecting young impressionable girls,” one said.
But while other fans threw their support behind the reality star and wellness blogger, condemning the trolls for their hate-filled messages, the negative commentary stuck with Ali.
So much so, it prompted a second post – one where she looked raw, make-up free and teary-eyed.
“I started my workout at 5am this morning because I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t sleep because online bullies comments hurt AND I disliked how so many comments on my recent post were right,” she wrote.
She went on to question her motives behind posting the image to begin with, touching on the pressures of social media and being in the public eye to appear “perfect”.
“I asked myself, why wasn’t my original photo good enough to share with the world?! At the time I thought, this photo of my face is not ‘pretty enough’. I have an image to uphold and must make it look flawless! Crap! It made me feel sh*t!! I don’t want to conform, I want to continue to inspire real women to love themselves for the bloody breathtaking beings that we are,” she passionately shared.
She continued: “I’m not confident 24/7, I’m vulnerable, fragile and sensitive… On my ‘good days’ my mindset stays strong that people’s comments are only a reflection of themselves. But on my bad days they HURT.”
She concluded with a message of empowerment: “[This is] a post to inspire women to know that we’re all good enough Just. The. Way. We. Are.”
Speaking to Mamamia, Ali said it was the negative vitriol which inspired her to “be more real” – a mantra she vows to stick to from now on when it comes to social media.
“I know I have a voice, and I think it should be used in a really positive way. I’m going through it, so I’m going to share my feelings and everything with all the other women out there,” she said.
“I want to empower women and encourage self-love by just being myself and telling the truth about how I feel.”
She added that the pressures to always portray perfection on Instagram can at times be overwhelming, but she is determined to shift the dialogue on Instagram to make it a space for body positivity and self-love.
“I wouldn’t normally put up a photo without makeup on Instagram because I’m looked at with a magnifying glass and I’m scared. I get scared because I think I have to be perfect,” she told Mamamia.
“Sometimes I think if I didn’t need social media for business I would just delete it because it’s so unhealthy… But it can be such a good platform for us to help each other, too.”
“[After the negative comments] I pondered on it all night, and it’s not me. Some of the comments about not portraying a good image for young girls really stuck with me. Then I’m like I have to be more real, I have to show them how to be real, too.”
It’s not the first time we’ve seen the influencer share her struggles with body image.
Speaking to The Sunday Telegraph last year, Ali confessed nine years ago she underwent breast enhancement surgery in order to impress a boyfriend, and she deeply regrets it.
“My boobs were not money well spent,” she said.
“If I had my time over, I would not have gotten them done.
“When I got them done, I did it for someone else. I thought it would make them happy.”
Top Comments
The irony as usual is that she looks about 50 times better in the natural photo than the ridiculously OTT made up one.
Unfortunately seeking other people’s approval means coming across those who are determined to withhold it.