How would you feel if this was the sight that greeted you when you walked into the bathroom in the morning?

Or this......



It's funny. When I think about it, all my girlhood popstar crushes were on men who wore make-up.
Fortunately, I grew out of this and my husband is not a guy-liner or man-scara wearing dude.

In the UK, cosmetics for men has become a 700 million pound industry. Woo hoo. Now men are being sold insecurity by beauty companies too. Welcome to our world.
This week, YSL launched it's famous Touche Eclat concealing pen to men. That's it above.
Yves Saint Laurent is confident that society is now ready for men in make-up.

“Sure of himself and his masculinity, L'Homme Yves Saint Laurent imposes his own style,” the company says in a glossy pamphlet that uses the word “virile” a lot. “He knows that his power of seduction, composed of strength and sensitivity, makes him irresistible.”

Who am I?

Ok, even I have reached my limit.

Regulars will be aware that I am an owner and occasional wearer of Crocs. I understand that many people find this disturbing. Even offensive. Until now, I have defended the Croc as a comfortable, utilitarian and ergonomic piece of footwear. Hey, I even showed you a picture of Shiloh Jolie-Pitt wearing a pair so you could see how similar my family is to hers. Croc wearers, all of us. So there.
HOWEVER. These new 'Croc Winter Boots' shall not be making an appearance on my feet any time soon. They are hideous. HIDEOUS.

 

For all the boys and some of the girls....

Helena, you really need to get to the gym more.
Here is the 39 year old former supermodel as a naughty pirate in the new campaign for UK lingerie brand Agent Provocateur (I don't think they make control pants...).
She's up there with Angelina for me in terms of Women I'd Turn For.

After the jump, more shots from the campaign and also the video. Who says we don't look after our men folk here on mamamia....

Control pants. Please discuss.

Since I have been trying to dress this new, more curvy body of mine post-pregnancy, I've discovered a little secret among women. Control pants. Suddenly, all sort of women are telling me about their Spanx - control undergarmets that suck in everything from thighs to bums to tummies to back fat.
Recently, J-Lo was photographed with her dress blowing up to reveal some serious control pants:

Rachel Zoe's digital make-over. Can you tell which is the before shot?

Remember Rachel Zoe? She's a Hollywood stylist who famously fell out with client Nicole Ritchie and the two of them sledged each other in the press. Something about one - or both - of them being so skinny and not eating. There were rumours about Rachel influencing her much younger clients - like Mischa Barton and Lindsay etc - to stay thin at all costs (drugs, anyone?) and making them into cloned versions of themselves.
Now, Zoe has a reality show that's about to start and she's done an interview with US Harpers Bazaar to promote it.
In the accompanying photo shoot, they've padded her up to show what she'd look like as a size 8 - she's a size 0.

Whose glasses look the silliest?

Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen have a coffee table book. Yes, I know it's exciting. And no I'm not sure how they decided which of them would go on the front cover. Rock, paper, scissors?
But take a breath, OK, because the excitement climaxes with the news that your favourite nutbag designer and mine, Mr Karl Lagerfeld is in it too. According to NY mag:

Influence consists only of interviews conducted by the Olsens (with editor Derek Blasberg in tow) with the world's most famous designers, photographers, artists, and tastemakers alongside pictures of them, their work, and the Olsens. We're talking long, involved, revealing interviews that are, you know, entertaining. With people like John Galliano, Christian Louboutin, Terry Richardson, Richard Prince, and more. Yes, a coffee-table book that's more than worth a read! Here are a few gems from one of our favorite interviews, with Karl Lagerfeld....

Vogue puts a US$100 bib on an impoverished child.

And who says fashion magazines are insensitive and insane?

In the August issue of Indian Vogue, there was a corker of a fashion shoot. Instead of using models or celebrities, someone decided it would be wacky fun to use real people. Real Indian poor people.

In the picture above, a toothless old woman holds a toddler in rumbled, dirty clothing, with a US$100 Fendi bib around his neck.

In another picture,a family of three squeezes onto a motorbike for their daily commute, the mother riding without a helmet and sidesaddle in the traditional Indian way — except that she has a Hermès Birkin bag -usually more than US$10,000, if you can find one -  prominently displayed on her wrist.

Elsewhere, a toothless barefoot man holds a Burberry umbrella - about US$200.

Ironic? Vulgar? Barking Bloody Mad?
I'm going for all three.

And wait until you hear what the Vogue India editor says in defence of the shoot......

FROCKWATCH: More garbage bag leggings

  Every so often, you become aware that you are too old for a trend. Garbage-bag tight leggings is one of those trends for me......and this is not a bad thing.

   

                  

                                             

       

Who am I?