Oh look. Pregnant man is pregnant again.

Actually, he's not a man. She's a woman who has had her breasts removed. And has some facial hair. That's all. Isn't that right? Or is your gender purely about how you feel, which sex you identify with, not the outside bits? Either way. They do seem rather intent on being public about what they're doing so perhaps it's a good thing for education and tolerance

Can you name the man in this picture with Heidi Klum?*

Women know a lot of drivel about celebrities. Men, generally, do not. I have struggled with this concept over the years, trying in vain to understand the evolutionary purpose of retaining information as pertinent as Heidi Klum’s relationship history and the fact that Billy Bob Thornton has a phobia about antiques. I don’t even LIKE Billy Bob Thornton. And yet still I know about the antiques.

This does not make me better than someone who’s blissfully ignorant of such things. It makes me worse. Particularly because this inane knowledge is squatting on valuable mental real estate that should be occupied by more relevant things like where the hell I parked my car at Westfield.

From a Darwinist perspective, it makes no sense either. Knowing that Winona Ryder and Gwyneth Paltrow used to be best friends until Gwyneth stole Winona’s script for Shakespeare In Love, won the part and an Oscar….is that going to help me survive a potato famine? Possible but unlikely.

Is this what's missing from your life?

Marvel with me at the genius that is The Boyfriend Pillow. Over at D-Listed, it was suggested that this might be "the perfect gift for the Jennifer Anniston in your life". The many many many Jen fans who have proudly come out of the woodwork to tell us that they think Angelina is not a goddess but a cow will not be happy with that little joke. I know. Still.

It's buisness time*

Have you been having sex with the same person for more than a year? Then you need to know this: there’s a 90 percent chance that you and your partner won’t have tried anything new in bed after your first-sex anniversary. Not even one teeny thing. And once you’re past the two-year mark? It’s almost certain the two of you will never try anything new in bed again. Never. Again.

That’s the startling sex news from psychologist, sexpert and author of the book Sizzling Sex, Dr Pam Spurr who interviewed more than 400 couples to confirm what many people already knew: variety may be the spice of life but not really of monogamy.

Dr Spur explained to The Times online, “I've come to call this the “two-year turn-off” because many partners find their uninspiring sex life does just that. There's often little motivation to have anything more than infrequent sex, which can cause relationships to flounder.”

And since women are usually the gatekeepers of sex in a relationship, the losers in the infrequent sex situation are most often men. A few months ago, I was reading a book which discussed this exact subject in one chapter.

This is funny. Because it's true. But.....

'Cosmopolitan' Institute Completes Decades-Long Study On How To Please Your Man

The whole 'how to please your man' accusation is not a new one for Cosmo. And in many ways, it's true. Cosmo has always run a whole lot of content that covers this subject.
However.
I will say two things about that.
Firstly? Women want to know how to be good in bed. They do. We do. I know this because sales always increased when we ran coverlines like "How to blow his mind" etc. Which we did often BECAUSE THE READERS WANTED IT. Not all women are born with the knowledge or the confidence to go for gold in the bedroom.
And like every other area of our lives - our hair, our careers, our wardrobes, our relationships, our brains - women like a bit of self-improveent. We like to get better at things. We like to do things well. Sex is no exception.
HOWEVER.

Diamond rings: a form of prostitution?

That's the inflammatory premise of an article that claims the whole diamond thing is a big marketing scam invented by diamond merchants De Beers and which women and men have been suckered into.
Writer Ken Mondschein says:

"Of course, in De Beers' defense, the pitch has to hit a receptive audience. Male engagement rings, popularized in the '20s, never took off in the way that men's wedding bands did. The marketing works because it ingeniously plays on men's complexes about love, status and money — if you don't buy her a diamond, it implies, you not only don't love her, you can't afford her.

 

Sex by numbers.

Carla Bruni-Sarkozy and French President Nicholas Sarkozy

Let’s play pretend. Ready? You’re a supermodel in the nineties, back when the word actually meant something. You are truly, genuinely super, one of fewer than ten supermodels in the world. Your peers are Cindy Crawford, Naomi Campbell, Linda Evangelista, Claudia Schiffer, Stephanie Seymour, Helena Christensen and Elle Macpherson.
You began modeling when you were 19 and quickly landed campaigns for Christian Dior, Yves Saint-Laurent, Chanel and Versace. You work and play hard with the biggest names in the fashion, film and music industries. Life is good. You are the hotness.
You walk kilometres in tricky shoes down the catwalks of Milan, Paris, New York and London and by the mid nineties, you’ve starred on 250 magazine covers. It’s an endless, global party and you earn $7.5 million a year for turning up.
For two decades, famous men are desperate to sleep with you. Some succeed. Eric Clapton writes in his memoirs about falling madly in love with you and how he begged Mick Jagger not to steal you. Mick does anyway and is your on-off lover for years.

Why is this guy single? Seriously, why? He's such a catch!

Here are two real voicemail messages left by a guy called Dimitri for a girl he met in the street in New York called Olga. You have to listen, no really, you have to.

15 lovers. Is that a lot?

French first lady , former supermodel and talented musician (I have both her albums, waiting on the third to be released) Carla Sarkozy has revealed she had "about 15" lovers before marrying the French president.

Fox news reports:

French first lady Carla Bruni-Sarkozy denies she has had 30 lovers, despite shocking fans by referring to them in her recently released album. The 40-year-old ex-model insists the controversial lyrics “my 30 lovers” were a result of "poetic license.”"It's not that I had a lot of lovers. It's that I never hide them. It's a different thing. I have not one day of regret," she told Paris Match. She says in actuality she has had 15 lovers.Before marrying 53-year-old President Nicolas Sarkozy in February, Bruni dated a number of high-profile celebrities, including rockers Mick Jagger and Eric Clapton.

 

So. Given that the woman is 40 years old and divorced with a child, is 15 a lot, a little or just right?

Your reaction to this number will depend heavily on how many people YOU'VE slept with.

A condom or a vasectomy? Tough choice for some.

Bridget Monyhan, Tom Brady & Giselle Bundchen

I learnt two new things about sperm this week. The first is that some men are extremely paranoid about women stealing their sperm. The second is that other men are extremely keen to give their sperm away.

But let’s kick off with the paranoid guys because gee, they’re fairly committed to their belief that there’s a rampant group of sperm stealers out there masquerading as – wait for it – women who want to have sex with them. Why? So that she can get knocked up and then steal all his money, of course!

And how are they dealing with this irrational fear? By ripping their pants off and running to the doctor for a pre-emptive vasectomy in their twenties and thirties. Believe it, there’s a growing trend for young single American men to go the snip to protect their DNA.

As with most modern trends, this one appears connected with a celebrity. In 2006, American football player, Tom Brady, broke up with his girlfriend, actress Bridget Moynahan. Soon after, she announced she was pregnant with his child and he announced he was dating supermodel Giselle Bundchen. An obscenely good looking mess ensued, played out in the tabloids. Natch.