There are some women who have always wanted to be mothers.
But what happens when this isn’t possible?
What if, for whatever reason – whether through a tragic death or miscarriage, being unable to conceive or simply never finding a partner to have a child with – a woman isn’t able to fulfill her dream of being a mother?
The reality is that the torment and the frustration and the emotional turmoil of desperately wanting, trying, or losing a baby is indescribable. And that anguish has to go somewhere, be driven into something – that’s how we cope.
The fast-growing ‘reborn’ subculture shows the – admittedly extreme – possible results of that kind of emotional trauma. This movement is comprised of people (mostly women) who collect startlingly lifelike newborn baby dolls.
These dolls are painstakingly handmade by specialist Reborn doll makers – and the women who buy them, generally treat the dolls as if they were real babies.
They take them to the grocery store.
They push them in strollers.
They feed them from a bottle.
When they carry them in their arms, they don’t haphazardly tug the toy along by one limb – they cradle the doll.
Reborn dolls are a part of their families.
Rebecca Martinez, a photographer who has extensively documented the Reborn movement, spoke to the New York Times about the women who collect these dolls:
Top Comments
I think there are worse things than getting involved in these dolls. The unfortunate aspect is that these arent real babies and can never duplicate the reality of being a mother. Motherhood has ups and downs successes and failures.We experience all kinds of things with our babies its never the same thing at least not with the first one. I only have one. The identity of being a mother is the appeal. I believe thats the real appeal but being a single mother i have never been a good bread winner which is another identity. I just have to live with that. I have to live with having never been a wife. It is life.
I dont fancy myself qualified to judge a woman and these dolls and its not so harmful its any of our business. I can say and will say sometimes I pick up other peoples babies and it feels good. Its not the same as having my own which i cant do now but its pretty awesome. Im sorry some of you wont get to experience motherhood the way i have and i wont lie i wish i could have been a real mom. A married mom.
I have no problem with the dolls as a form of collectable art (except that I have seen much more realistic and not quite so ugly ones as were presented in this article), I do however have a problem when they are treated like real babies. That, to me, is disturbing. I think it is beautiful that mothers who have lost children wish to immortalise them in this way, but if the doll is treated as a real baby, rather than a beautiful reminder, well I'm sorry but they need some professional help for their grief. Make them, collect them by all means, but leave them on a display shelf where they belong.
I agree that talking to them to a point of loosing reality is going to far, but to role play with your daughters or to hold them and admire them is not wrong. No different then holding a teddy bear given by a boyfriend/husband. It is not anyone's place to say where the dolls should sit, and on a shelf seems like a waste. They look much better in a vintage basinet or propped on an old iron bed.