Hello lovely MM readers and welcome to another week’s Open Post. The year is winding down, and if you’re looking for a place to vent, share or offer up advice to others– this is certainly the place to be.
Recently I was invited to a Katy Perry concert with a few other lovely ladies who work in the media. I was a bit nervous at first, not knowing any of the other invitees. But I let go of my inhibitions, danced through the entire concert, and ended up having the BEST NIGHT with them all.
Usually introverted me was a bit chuffed.
First we all went to the Ground of Alexandria and ate lots of cheese and crackers, and drank cocktails out of giant watermelons. It was my first time there (I know, I know), and I can now officially say the hype is totally warranted.
Next we arrived at the Arena only to hear all the Kitty Purry glow-in-the-dark concert ears had been sold out. Obviously we then ordered wine to console ourselves.
We then found this seriously terrifying Katy Perry mask under our seats. This face now haunts my dreams.
Top Comments
I am 56 woman - a professional person. Nobody calls me. I always reach out to others and they never contact me.I am feeling really down and lonely today and I wonder if I have flaws which make others not reach out to me. I would love some advice or suggestions. Thanks.
It's really hard to tell what's going on for you. All I can suggest is possibly joining different groups of people with shared interests eg a reading group or a dancing group. The other thing you could do is join your profession's networking group. And if there isn't one, you could always start one!! Good luck.
Hello there. I am sorry to hear you are having a hard time right now.
I find true, balanced and enduring friendships can be challenging to find and maintain, especially as we move through life and its stages.
May I suggest ..? You maybe just haven't met your kind of people?
Take some risks. Hit your local paper 'what's on' section, visit your local library and read community noticeboards to join a few clubs/ groups. Try meetup.com and actually go to things - what things? Do (almost) ANYTHING. Although far better if it is something you enjoy so you stick with it. Is there anythning you have always wanted to try or to learn? Say a language or a sport or exercise? Get some weekly activities outside of work. Do a short course! Ensure they are mixed gender activities and interactive not stuff people tend to do solo.
If you want to approach other people in these situations ask for advice or tips. Say 'I noticed you seem to be good at <insert something="" here="">. How did you learn it so quickly? Can you show me' Or 'I practiced that at home but I couldn't quite master it. How are you finding this?' Make excuses to comment on something simple and ordinary - practically anything will do - even 'Oh, I almost bought the same shoes! Are they from *store name*?' to break the ice, and say after a few moments 'oh, by the way I am *first name*'. But maybe this time around, wait until they suggest swapping numbers or catching up so you don't feel like the initiator.
Do you do anything outside of work? Any interests? Do you volunteer? There is a site called meet up I believe, with groups of people seeking friends. There are literally, hundreds of groups on this site, catering to all sorts of interests. Maybe it's worth a try.
You're not flawed Juliet. I don't know the reasons why people have not reached out to you today. I work as a psychiatric nurse and today I looked after many people who are in hospital (professionals and non-professionals) who didn't receive any wishes this Christmas from family or friends. It made me reflect on how important human contact and connection is to our wellbeing especially during events like Christmas. I tried to help each of my patients by wishing them a merry Christmas, sitting down to listen to them talk about their loneliness at this time of year but also getting them to reflect on what they have to look forward to as well as being grateful and happy for what they do have. This can be a challenge at times but I think it's important for people to feel validated and listened to. Juliet, I'm sorry to hear Christmas is an isolating time for you this year. I hope you can take some time to reflect on the good things you do for others, the things you have to look forward to and the great things you already have. I would also recommend reading Rebecca sSarrow's great post recently published on MM, a really empathetic and sensitive read. I wish you all the best, please be kind to yourself Juliet :)
Merry Christmas everyone! It's Christmas eve and we are ready pretty much. 2014 has been pretty trying so looking forward to 2015. :) and to tomorrow when the kids will think Santa has been!!