By REBECCA SPARROW
“Take someone you trust, your mother, your sister, your best friend. Someone who’s had children, who knows that place. If they have healthcare experience, all the better. But trust matters more than this.”
That bit of sublime wisdom isn’t from me. It’s from novelist and author of the brilliant non-fiction book Birth Wars, Mary-Rose Maccoll on who she believes you should choose to have in the delivery room with you when you give birth.
“When researching Birth Wars I spoke to so many women who were so frightened and alone in labour despite their partners being there beside them – birth is a big deal for partners too so it’s a big ask for them to look after a birthing woman as well – and having someone who really cares about you and focuses only on that seems to make a difference … But for me, with my experience of a first baby and my fears, I really needed a woman who’d given birth beside me, and one I could trust with my life.”
(Thank God for Mary-Rose because my advice about giving birth would’ve been more along the lines of, ‘You will suddenly find yourself falling in love with your anaesthetist’ quickly followed by ‘Don’t be afraid to order two desserts off the menu for dinner. They’ll totally give them to you.’)
Regardless of whether your babies were delivered through the sun roof (technical term) or out of your hoo-ha (technical term), it doesn’t matter. It’s still a time, a moment, when the whole world stops and life is changed through the arrival of a new little being.
Top Comments
for my first, just my hubby. I know my mum is desperate to attend my next birth but I just think she'd drive me nuts...pushing my husband out of the way because she is the expert on everything, it wouldn't even surprise me if she pushed my doctor out of the way to take over!!!
For my child's birth, we were living interstate without support. My mum had planned to fly in to be there for me and my new best friend was going to be minding my daughter.
But mum was diagnosed with breast cancer and she had to stay home and have treatment and my best friend who was also heavily pregnant, went into labour on the same day - she was two weeks early and I was one week late!
So, it ended up being me, my husband, the medical staff and our 3 year old daughter, because we were interstate with no-one to mind her.
I had guilt for years about my daughter her being in the labour ward. I thought she may have been traumatised but thankfully all she remembers is the nice nurses and the ice-cream!