Bereavement leave when a pet dies. Do you say "absolutely" or "harden up"?

Should Australian workers be able to take bereavement leave when a pet dies?

Rio Tinto boss Phil Edmands says no. He’s rejected the proposal from unions that mining workers should have more paid leave, including bereavement leave for when a pet dies. When you talk about this topic — which everyone is — you very quickly sort the sooks from the hard-asses.

We got two writers to argue For and Against pet bereavement leave.

In the sook corner, we’ve got Kate Leaver – arguing that bereavement leave for pets is valid and compassionate. From the hard-asses, we’ve got Sally Roberts – arguing that taking days off to grieve a pet is ludicrous.

“Absolutely”: Kate Leaver

Should we be allowed to take a few days to recover from a devastating, life-altering loss? Abso-freaking-lutely. Grief is grief, whether it’s been caused by the loss of a human or the death of a pet. It’s one of the most visceral emotions a human can get smacked in the gut with – and not even our bosses should decide what kind of grief is valid, and what isn’t.

I don’t believe in competitive grief. I do believe in maximum compassion in the workplace – and that includes paid leave for someone who has just lost their beloved dog or cat. A goldfish? Perhaps not. But if a four-legged member of the family dies, their human companion should be given the space to grieve if they need it.

To properly illustrate my point, you need to meet my dog. Lady Fluffington is about 10 years old and we adopted her from a dog rescue shelter about 3 years ago.

When we met, she was abandoned, matted, terrified, with rotten teeth and a slipped disc. She took maybe 3 months to feel comfortable in our company, and now she’s incorrigibly happy.

Lady Fluff is so important to me, I’ve had several people in my life genuinely suggest she becomes my official support dog. She’s my companion, my little buddy, my comfort, and my hairy canine baby.

The thought of her not being around literally takes my breath away. If she was hurt or passed away from old age (I prefer to think of her as immortal for the time being, to stop the panicky feeling of a world without Fluffington), I would grieve her death in exactly the same way I would grieve a human’s death. She’s a member of my family and my spirit animal. When she goes, I will be inconsolable. I will go through each debilitating stage of grief as though she were a person.

When that happens, my boss will almost-definitely receive a request for pet bereavement leave.

I’d like to think I’d be in the kind of workplace that would grant that request without question. As a general rule, I think corporate leaders should be showing more compassion to their employees. There’s bountiful research to say that giving people their birthday off, granting extra holiday leave, early marks, or even just snacks in the office can increase morale significantly. There’s also research to say that having pets in the home or office makes people happier, calmer, and more receptive to stress.

The type of workplace that recognises grief is uniquely hideous, pets are fabulous for human happiness, and people deserve maximum compassion? That’s somewhere I want to be, and I think it should be the standard for Australian businesses.

“Harden Up”: Sally Roberts

Her name was Penny. She had one blue eye, one brown eye, an ability to sniff out food from 200 paces, and could sense when you were sad or upset and put her head on your lap. She was our first family pet, a beagle we named after Penelope Pitstop from the 80s cartoon, The Wacky Races.

As she got older her coat thinned out and turned grey, we noticed she became wobbly and would bump into things. We soon discovered her sight was gone, and then she developed diabetes. Though none of our family was particularly great with needles, my devout eldest brother would administer her twice-daily insulin injections.

Six months later she died in her sleep. I say ‘in her sleep’ but my brother was awake, holding her paw her until her last breath.

It was devastating. As the youngest in the family, though hard to comprehend, it was my first experience that life wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows.

Losing a pet is an emotionally intense experience. They are a part of the family. For some, they are the only family they have, but at the risk of sounding like I have a cold, dead heart I don’t think that employers should have to pay for pet bereavement leave (PBL).

Neither does Rio Tinto Australia managing director Phil Edmands. In response to a claim for PBL reportedly from the Construction, Forestry, Mining and Energy Union he called the demands allowing miners to take paid leave for losing a pet as “unreasonable”.

“Of course everyone is entitled to put forward whatever demands he or she wishes in relation to employment conditions,” Edmands said. “But the system should limit the ability of ambit claims to cause delay and damage labour market flexibility.”

And I agree. If you want to take a day or a week of unpaid or annual leave off, then of course you should be entitled to that. But I don’t think the boss should have to shell out for your grief. As compassionate as they may be, they ultimately have a business to run.

But what about parents taking maternity leave I hear you say. It’s the same thing! I’d argue that it’s not at all. Babies can’t survive on their own. We can’t leave a bowl or food and water bottle out for them to feed themselves.

What do you think? Paid pet bereavement leave yes or no?