Pete Evans's fiancee just announced her dog's first period.

It’s a special time in every girl’s life.

God, there’s nothing more embarrassing than getting your period for the first time then discovering your mum told everyone about it.

Likewise, there can be no greater snub than posting the news of your little one’s first menses and receiving only ridicule in response.

So we must spare a thought for both Nicola Robinson, 38, and her dog, Shikoba. There are no winners here.

Robinson posted a picture of herself and Shikoba, a miniature poodle, to Instagram with news of Shikoba’s first special time for all to see.

“My Mummy is doing a good job at looking after me during my very first ‘moon time!'” Robinson wrote for Shikoba, whose personality and musings she has interpreted with much liberty.

“She’s going to teach me how to sync my cycle with the Moon too!”

Yes, this is the woman paleo evangelist Pete Evans is engaged to. It’s perfect, no?

Robinson, who goes by the Instagram handle Nutrition Mermaid, regularly posts her dog’s thoughts to the social media site, that is when she’s not posting pictures of chooks recommending meditation books or horses whose eyes “sparkle with intent”.

Here are some powerful thoughts Shikoba has been having while gazing out to sea recently:

“See… I am a wolf! The influential power of my energetic self is much, much more significant than that of my physical body! Right from the beginning my Mum has nurtured & encouraged me to be my unique self, because she knows that the most consequential feature of a parent & child relationship is the manner with which a parent judges & then reacts to what is basically their child’s ingenuous & spontaneous behaviour. In other words, my Mummy guides me with love, not fear, which is crucial to the fulfilment of my innate potential & growth as a conscious being!” #wolfpoodle ????

It’s so weird how Pete Evans’ views on food went really nuts after they met.

Anyway, here’s a recipe for Robinson’s mother’s mylk. I hope she wasn’t saving it for Pete’s next book:

Aside from living a lifestyle that avoids exposure to inflammatory foods & environmental toxins, we also protect our Earth Suits, in particular our brains with anti-inflammatory & antioxidant compounds that dampen microglia neuroinflammation (apigenin, baicalein, catechin, curcumin, luteolin, resveratrol & rutin). I make my Sunshine☀️Mylk with plenty of fresh organic turmeric, @livinglibations turmeric oil (one of my favourite scores from @peaceloveandvegetables ), a homemade mix of coconut, almond & macadamia mylk, vanilla bean, cardamom oil & a couple of drops of black peeper oil (to boost the bioavailability of the curcumin, which is the active constituent of turmeric). #brainlove

#Gag.

Anyway, I’m off for a chia pudding and to practise syncing with the moon. Ciao!

Check out the life of Shikoba and her mum before Shikoba became a woman today…