‘Oh my God. Do you guys have sex? Do fat people even have sex at all? Does your husband even WANT to have sex with you? Can he even get an erection?’
This one time, a producer of a popular evening news television program called me to request an interview — body positivity, et cetera. The fellow, we’ll just call him Bill, was nice enough, not at all abrasive, and seemed genuine. He didn’t chastise me for my supposed laziness, my poor eating habits or lack of discipline, my BMI of 31 (32?), my glaringly obvious double chin, the three packages of biscuits in my cupboard.
And then the real pitch started with him talking about my “skinny” husband, what’s it’s like to be a fat (and by association, unfortunate?) woman in a relationship with a thin man (apparently this is called a “mixed weight” relationship. RUDE.). The conversation ended with my saying I’ll be in touch — and then never being in touch.
He didn’t have to tell me what he was getting at. Shows that are founded on the premise of you have personal “problem,” and are, therefore, worthy of gawking at, are good for ratings. Especially when they involve love and/or vaginas.
Because:
A. Even though it is an anatomical truth that my husband is, in fact, smaller than me, it certainly doesn’t warrant an entire half-hour program devoted to its discussion.
B. The fact that anyone thinks that the love/sex habits of a fat woman and her skinny counterpart are television worthy only reinforces the perception that the life of a fat person is so obscure, so completely outlandish, that the world would need a docu-drama to understand it.
C. No.
Hi World, there is nothing about me that is TV worthy, except I have five kids. That’s literally a sitcom.
(SPOILER ALERT: We are totally, painfully average.)
Top Comments
These questions would be extremely rude but as far as I can see occurred only in the writer's head which suggests she may have some issues but that's her own affair and none of our business. She appears to think that the producer may have thought this but, based on the article, he never asked any of them. Generally best to base our views on other people on what they actually do rather than what we think they really want to do but don't.
What a rude jerk!
I'm sure this article is helpful to a lot of women , but what I think would be extremely helpful perhaps even more so if there were some blogs from guys talking about how much they adore their plump wife, find her sexy etc. because I'm slightly overweight and I worry about it too.
Of course being in good health and therefore at a healthy weight (whatever that may be) should be a goal, but I think we shouldn't be judged on this, because surely the contents of our minds and hearts should be the important aspect, or am just being hopelessly naïve that being a good person should be considered more attractive than just someone's weight.
I have a friend who never has a bad word to say about anyone, she never gossips or divulges secrets , she is good tempered, kind and tolerant, but I know she has some issues about her weight. I think here she is with one of the nicest personalities of anyone I have ever met and she's worrying if she meets the grade because of her weight. By the way her boyfriend adores her, and no wonder, but it's sad that this whole weight thing brings her self esteem done.
I also question what this pursuit of looking great does to our souls when so many of is put more precedence on looking good being thin then working on bettering our personalities or minds.
I would love to hear from some men are there women you know who aren't considered physically attractive yet you find very attractive because of their lovely personality?