“I still feel guilty for what happened. I know I shouldn’t have had her in bed with me.”
A young mother, torn apart by guilt over the death of her daughter, has vowed to never have another baby after her six-week-old daughter died while co-sleeping with her.
Sequioa Eddy, 18, says she is still haunted by the morning in February when she woke to find her newborn baby, Nevaeh, dead alongside her.
The young mother from Christchurch in New Zealand was overcome with exhaustion when she took her baby into her own bed for the first time in February this year.
She told The New Zealand Herald that her daughter had her own bassinet and co-sleeping was a one off.
“It was just the first time I had slept with her. She was just a mummy’s girl and didn’t go to sleep without mum.”
“I woke up at 7.30 in the morning and she was still breathing, and then I woke up at 8.25am and she was dead. I woke up to her dead next to me.”
Ms Eddy, who fell pregnant at the age of 17, gave birth the same day her mother was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer.
While her mother battled the disease Ms Eddy cared for her three younger brothers, 13-year-old twins and an 11-year-old.
Tragically a week after the death of baby Nevaeh Ms Eddy’s mother died as well.
“It’s been such a struggle to come to terms with this.
“I can’t change what happened … but I can’t stop wishing that I could. I sucked it all in and didn’t cry, I didn’t have time to. I do have my moments now and then.”
“She [her mother] died in my arms six days after my daughter. It was sad watching her be in so much pain and I couldn’t do anything.
Ms Eddy says when she woke up to her daughter’s lifeless body she tried to resuscitate her using CPR but she could not revive her.
Top Comments
To all the anti co-sleepers... Did none of you notice that the article states that 44% of sudden and unexpected infant deaths in NSW since 2003 were co-sleeping infants??? So in other words, 56% or over half were not co-sleeping. Honestly people, read the information more carefully. That statistic alone shows that there is little difference in danger levels between co-sleeping and non co-sleeping infants. If anything, it states that co-sleeping is safer.
Well yes if you completely ignore that fact that most people DONT co-sleep!, 44% coming from 10% of infants is hardly a positive outcome, and most certainly doesn't state co-sleeping is safer, quite the opposite in fact!.
This was a really hard article to read and made me question my own sleep practices.
For the first 5 weeks of my babies life, she slept in her bassinet, I was scared I would roll on her. In the early weeks, she breastfed for ages, sometimes up to 1.5 hours while trying to build up milk supply.
One night she fed for ages, and she fell asleep in my arms, and I almost dropped her on the floor because I was exhausted and I fell asleep in an upright position. Luckily my mother walked into the room at that moment and caught her as she was slipping. Then it kept happening, I kept falling asleep while holding her. It didn't feel safe to me at all.
I spoke to a midwife about it who suggested I learn to feed her on my side and sleep. She told me to start off with naps and have someone watch me. That advice was perfect for me and I started co sleeping. Whenever my daughter woke up in the middle of the night, I put her on my boob and slept again.
When she was 10 weeks old, my husband and I moved to a developing country in the pacific for work. Everyone co sleeps here, everyone. Few can afford cots. However because of the hot climate, bedding is limited. Most nights we don't use sheets.
Cosleeping has been great for my family. It has allowed me to continue breastfeeding and for us to get very good sleep. Another reason why we bed share is because unfortunately, home invasions are common in our town and it's just completely unsafe for her to sleep in another room as child abductions have occurred.
Great comment :)